Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my dad found and read my diary. Most of the entries were about how my father didn't respect my privacy. Then he phoned my aunt and read her passages from it. FML

#10994237
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38892) - you deserved it (3688)

On 06/05/2010 at 7:49pm - misc - by ugh (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 3-year-old broke his glasses, clogged the toilet with Hot Wheel cars, and covered the whole house with Cheerios. All in a matter of roughly 6 minutes while I was putting laundry away. FML

#21393865
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31459) - you deserved it (3688)

On 04/15/2015 at 12:17am - kids - by mommylife (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I came home to my mom dancing the hustle naked. With a group of 4 friends. FML

#17117147
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41165) - you deserved it (3687)

On 07/15/2011 at 2:25am - intimacy - by SCREWED (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my fiancé decided he wants to buy an engagement ring for his mother, so that she doesn't feel left out. FML

#18135623
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41636) - you deserved it (3687)

On 11/02/2011 at 12:49am - love - by heatherjo - United States

Today, my friends and I were talking about our celebrity lookalikes. We decided that my friends all had attractive celebrity lookalikes, including Scarlett Johansson and Hayden Panettiere. When it was my turn, they decided that my "celebrity" lookalike is the Pillsbury Doughboy. FML

#21330766
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27508) - you deserved it (3687)

On 01/04/2015 at 4:53pm - misc - by KD (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was planning on going on a date with a girl I've really liked. She told me today was the only we could hang out before her trip. I got an expensive hair cut, planned on cooking her dinner, and pulled a few strings and got on the list for a big concert. Turns out she'd rather go shopping FML

#6377384
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30360) - you deserved it (3686)

On 11/20/2009 at 3:25am - love - by sadday (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was with my boyfriend and we were in his car when he burst out crying, I thought it might have been because we had gotten into a huge fight and he felt bad. No, he cried on my shoulder for a half hour because he misses his ex-girlfriend. He's been writing songs about wanting her back. FML

#13805419
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35742) - you deserved it (3686)

On 11/11/2010 at 7:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my boyfriend about how a few years ago I had cancer, and how I underwent radiation therapy. His response? "Did you glow in the dark?" FML

#18466406
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32064) - you deserved it (3686)

On 12/09/2011 at 2:41am - health - by GlowInTheDark (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I let my 9-year-old daughter use my tablet while I made her dinner. A few minutes later, she let out a blood-curdling scream. Turned out she'd searched for My Little Pony pictures and stumbled upon a drawing of Rainbow Dash giving another pony a blowjob. FML

#21463707
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21810) - you deserved it (3686)

On 09/02/2015 at 11:26am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML

#6422671
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39293) - you deserved it (3685)

On 11/23/2009 at 4:11pm - love - by TheGirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, this guy I've been "seeing" for a year said he didn't want to share my birthday with me because he doesn't want us to get serious. FML

#13245354
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27077) - you deserved it (3685)

On 09/29/2010 at 2:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, I was in the car with my mom. We were discussing my brother, how he's been screwing up majorly lately and she blamed it on his friends. Then she turned to me and said, "It's a good thing you've never had any friends." FML

#14189966
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30062) - you deserved it (3685)

On 12/13/2010 at 11:29am - misc - by Amanda - United States



FML's blog

  • RoSaCe's illustrated FML
  • Back to business! Yep, everyone is back from their vacation, unless you're a rich, childfree, lovin' life-type of person who doesn't go on holiday when everybody else does, and can do whatever they…

Friday 4 September 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: