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Today, my girlfriend dragged me along to one of her family's paintball matches. Her father is a former marine, and hates my guts. He kept going well out of his way to hunt me down and pump as many rounds into me as possible without causing a scene. FML

#19503572
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28967) - you deserved it (3869)

On 04/20/2012 at 10:48pm - love - by fuck (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with the prettiest, most simple ring I have ever seen. I called my sister to tell her the good news, and her response was, "I know. He had me steal the ring from Claire's." FML

#20432536
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43723) - you deserved it (3869)

On 12/30/2012 at 6:58pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, working in customer support, I received a call from a woman who'd just been robbed. My supervisor asked what was taking so long; I told him that she was hysterical. He took my phone and told her to call back when she had her "shit together", then hung up. I take orders from this man. FML

#20595880
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43400) - you deserved it (3869)

On 04/16/2013 at 6:50am - work - by no compassion - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was feeling really down and insecure after a friend joked about how small my boobs are. When my grandma got me to tell her what happened, she reassured me that all the girls in our family were late bloomers. I said "Really?" and she replied, "Oh no dear. Quite the opposite." FML

#21087397
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37516) - you deserved it (3869)

On 03/15/2014 at 3:34pm - misc - by nerdlette (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up early and took my medication to help me focus while catching up on lectures. I ended up spending the whole day focused on fixing my drawer for no apparent reason. FML

#21440955
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23975) - you deserved it (3869)

On 07/13/2015 at 9:56am - misc - by distracted - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I needed to job shadow someone for my winter break career project. Not finding someone to take me along to their job, my mom suggested shadowing my dad. Not wanting to hurt his feelings, I went with him. All day I sat and helped him test human poop samples for parasites. Some was diarrhea. FML

#6990979
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29150) - you deserved it (3868)

On 12/28/2009 at 10:14am - work - by kawaiixalice (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dad brought me home after I was in the hospital for a week. He gets me to my room, hands me a glass of water and some granola bars, then leaves me on my own so he can go play golf. FML

#12236512
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29017) - you deserved it (3868)

On 08/01/2010 at 12:10am - health - by lonely (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my parents took my iPad back to the store and exchanged it for two cheap knock off tablets. Reason being my little brother threatened to run away because I had one and he didn't. I bought the iPad on my own after graduation. They kept the difference in price. FML

Today, my dad heard that the guy who bullied me at school died recently of a drug overdose. For some reason, he thinks we were actually best friends, and thinks I'm doing drugs too. I'm now not allowed out of the house except to go to school. He won't listen to a word I say. FML

#21183278
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47853) - you deserved it (3868)

On 06/21/2014 at 4:32pm - misc - by kay-z (man) - United States

Today, I was about to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. As things got heated, he broke down crying. I assumed it was just anxiety so I hugged him and told him it's alright and that it didn't matter, we'd try another time. Half an hour later, he confessed that he's actually gay. FML

Today, I was working retail when a group of older gentlemen came in looking for a good sound system. I showed them a top-range system and gushed about it in detail, trying to close the sale. One of them snorted and said, "See Dave, girls like her are the reason ball gags were invented." FML

#19268166
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26658) - you deserved it (3867)

On 03/12/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by sandi519 (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to rid me of my hiccups. As he'd screamed at me and I'd pissed my pants, I just burst into tears. FML

#21279967
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31939) - you deserved it (3867)

On 10/17/2014 at 4:12pm - health - by catt - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I took my grandma to the hospital to visit her estranged husband who she hasn't seen in years. After a thoroughly disasterous visit, we're waiting in the carpark and my gran strokes my face and tells me I have a lot of facial hair. I thought she was going to thank me. And I'm a girl. FML

#2223599
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43043) - you deserved it (3866)

On 05/23/2009 at 9:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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