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Today, I found out my boyfriend and I have more in common than I thought. We both are sexually attracted to men. FML

Today, I had to wake up at 4am because my boss set an important business meeting for first thing in the morning. After making sure everything was ready, I went to work. My boss ended up oversleeping and moved the meeting to tomorrow. FML

Today, someone broke into my car to steal $1.50. FML

#10908235
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31959) - you deserved it (3354)

On 06/01/2010 at 2:47pm - money - by Brokeashell - United States

Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML

#14719810
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41367) - you deserved it (3354)

On 01/26/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by 123roomielover (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my mom found a box full of stuff she had been looking for. She starts going through it and finds baby pictures of my sister and I as well as pictures of the cats. She puts my baby pictures back in the box and closes the lid. The cat pictures are now hanging in her living room. FML

#656322
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47267) - you deserved it (3353)

On 03/28/2009 at 1:38am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, during a class, I noticed some racist statements and symbols on a table. While erasing them, I bent down to pick up my dropped pencil. I look back up to see a teacher, and got a suspension. FML

#15162285
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33064) - you deserved it (3353)

On 03/01/2011 at 11:47am - misc - by assumed -

Today, my mum got engaged to her American pen-pal, who is in prison over there for murder. FML

Today, while at my brother's funeral, my girlfriend decided to tell me she's been sleeping with him. FML

#21126504
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54262) - you deserved it (3353)

On 04/29/2014 at 6:40pm - love - by loserman - United States (Texas)

Today, I heard back from a company that I recently interviewed with. They told me I didn't get the job because "it was obvious that I had been coached." I wasn't. Sorry that I actually researched the company unlike the rest of the nit-wit candidates. FML

#21203575
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44439) - you deserved it (3353)

On 07/09/2014 at 1:02am - work - by jobless (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my colleague and I played yet another wonderful game of 'Tapeworm or Toilet Paper?' in the homeless shelter's toilets we were asked to clean. FML

#21270023
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29196) - you deserved it (3353)

On 10/03/2014 at 7:29am - work - by whydoidothis (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I am a Frenchie who's been in England for two months. While wanting to say to my technician that my manager made me groan during our meeting, I said that he made me moan. Now he keeps looking at me with a grin on his face. FML

#546
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17519) - you deserved it (3352)

On 12/18/2008 at 11:30am - misc - by ladyhead - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull)

Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML

#5518308
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27104) - you deserved it (3352)

On 09/27/2009 at 11:16pm - intimacy - by NiHao (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my boss fired me because "I didn't get the right kind of coffee beans." FML

#8837670
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22410) - you deserved it (3352)

On 03/05/2010 at 12:23am - work - by koletatlow19 - Canada (Saskatchewan)



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  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

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