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Today, I went on my fifth date with my new girlfriend. Apparently, she was in such a rush while leaving work that she forgot to take off her wedding ring. FML

#20567033
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45161) - you deserved it (3232)

On 03/30/2013 at 3:02pm - love - by unknown - France

Today, a customer at work said his table was dirty. I asked which one he was sitting at so I could clean it for him. For some bizarre reason he got pissed and called my manager over. He ended up reporting us to corporate, and my manager got written up. He's blaming me for everything. FML

#21163809
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41002) - you deserved it (3232)

On 06/05/2014 at 11:16am - work - by DarkSerebii (woman) - United States

Today, I told my parents I wanted them to meet my new partner. My mom went into a rant about how she had known I was gay for a while and asked how I was going to tell my husband. I am straight, madly in love with my husband, and was referring to my business partner. FML

Today, I found out that my mom is not only reading my mail, but she is also withholding letters from my bank, college, and insurance company. Why? Because "they could be inappropriate" for me to read. I'm 25. FML

Today, I woke up excited to go trick-or-treating, the treat being candy. Instead, my town has officially postponed Halloween due to blackouts. I guess this is where the trick comes in. FML

#18121286
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22469) - you deserved it (3231)

On 10/31/2011 at 3:11pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I thought I was going to my doctor for a yearly check-up. My father had actually tricked me into therapy. FML

#19323093
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18744) - you deserved it (3231)

On 03/21/2012 at 9:50pm - health - by nazooer - United States

Today, my girlfriend started bawling, saying that our relationship wouldn't work. Why? Because if Justin and Selena can't do it, no one can. FML

#20178699
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28062) - you deserved it (3231)

On 11/25/2012 at 7:55pm - love - by nonbelieber (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mother dragged me into Victoria's Secret to get my opinion on some lingerie. Lingerie she'll be using to get into my dad's pants this evening. FML

#14731317
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31254) - you deserved it (3230)

On 01/27/2011 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

#18121591
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32701) - you deserved it (3230)

On 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm - love - by poopcoloredeyes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

#20556205
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43548) - you deserved it (3230)

On 03/23/2013 at 9:25am - kids - by kindergarten teacher - United States (California)

Today, I found out that while having a GPS tracker in your car is helpful for tracking down car thieves, it's also helpful to your psycho ex, who can use it to track you down. FML

#20846264
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39606) - you deserved it (3230)

On 08/20/2013 at 12:28pm - misc - by nobieb (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took my SUV in to get the oil changed, and the tires rotated. They allowed me to stay there, because they said it would only take 30 minutes. So I sit there in the waiting room, and I look through the window only to see my SUV falling off the lift, from 6 feet in the air. FML

#5955896
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38960) - you deserved it (3229)

On 10/23/2009 at 6:09am - misc - by effmylife (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was visited by Child Protective Services. Seems someone on my street reported me for neglect because I cloth diaper my children. I moved in less than 6 months ago, so I guess this is how they say, "welcome to the neighborhood" about these parts. FML

#6660369
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30589) - you deserved it (3229)

On 12/08/2009 at 2:02am - kids - by ClothMom (woman) - United States (Hawaii)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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