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Today, my boyfriend bailed on our one year anniversary celebration because his ex girlfriend asked him to go to a wedding with her and pose as her fake boyfriend. FML

by iheartexes / 11/06/2010 at 12:52am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I found out that the girl who my high school boyfriend cheated on me with is now the woman my husband is having an affair with. FML

by sad / 01/08/2011 at 12:22am / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I informed my parents that my husband and I are separating after much deliberation. We came to this conclusion relatively peacefully. According to my parents, I'm now Satan, and will end up on the streets as a crack whore if we don't change our minds and stay together. FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2011 at 2:04am / Canada / Love

Today, I woke up at 5 am to the voices of my husband, who I gave my blessing to go out last night, and his buddies entering our apartment. They came here because the buddy who had planned to house them had no beer. They are drunk, drinking on our porch, shaving my husband's head. FML

by furious at five in the morning / 07/02/2012 at 8:36am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my girlfriend what she loves the most about me. She said it's the fact that I look like her cousin. FML

by Anonymous / 12/08/2013 at 11:49am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. Every 20 minutes or so, I'll get a notification that I have a new message, and I check it just to find that same message sitting there. I'm being trolled by my own phone. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 2:49am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, while working at the hospital, I had a patient with a blocked bowel. It was so bad, feces were entering into her stomach. While leaning down to talk with her, she threw up. I was both vomited and defecated on at the same time. FML

by Mew / 06/04/2009 at 8:07am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I learned just how much change a toddler can stuff in to a Nintendo Wii. I also learned that those things are put together with special screws. FML

by Gameless Guy / 12/24/2009 at 10:49am / United States / Kids

Today, I walk into my grandma's house after having a fabulous lunch with a few friends. The first thing I hear is "Be a dear and help me change my colostomy bag." I lost that fabulous lunch. FML

by NoThanksGrandma / 11/20/2011 at 2:37am / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to be healthy and go for a run. I broke my ankle. FML

by Monkey253100 / 06/03/2012 at 10:47am / France / Health

Today, I went into work to waitress on a table of 40 guests. They were my only table for the day and the bill came to over 700 dollars. After they left the busser was cleaning the table and threw out the credit card receipt which had my tip on it. FML

by Anonymous / 06/28/2009 at 2:43pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, my boyfriend and I went for a ride in a paddle-boat. He decided it would be fun to paddle near the fountain. The fountain decided it would be fun to shower me, him and all of our things in filthy, stinking duck water. I had to ride the bus home by myself. FML

by duckwater / 03/01/2010 at 1:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I was taking my architecture project to school. I'd spent days preparing my little model house. I stepped outside with it in my hand, and right at that moment a gust of wind ripped it away. It's currently lying in my neighbour's garden, smashed to pieces. FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2011 at 1:47pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous