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Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died." right afterwards. FML

#21085148
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40656) - you deserved it (3318)

On 03/12/2014 at 8:11pm - work - by Anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I told the girl I've been seeing for a while about the strong feelings that I have for her and that I was falling in love. She told me my words made her realize what it felt like to be in love. My words were so powerful, in fact, that she ran right back into the arms of her ex boyfriend. FML

#13331586
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35580) - you deserved it (3317)

On 10/05/2010 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out I'm the only one in my family to wash their hands after they use the bathroom. FML

#11804292
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35353) - you deserved it (3317)

On 07/11/2010 at 2:06am - health - by Cheyenne - United States (Washington)

Today, I was attacked by clowns at work. I don't work at the circus. FML

#14894865
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29588) - you deserved it (3317)

On 02/08/2011 at 11:27am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, the nicest thing said to me all day was from my microwave that flashes 'enjoy your meal' when it finishes cooking something. FML

#14872504
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25512) - you deserved it (3317)

On 02/06/2011 at 9:05pm - misc - by bymyself -

Today, I was arrested for carrying a dangerous weapon. I was on my way home from the shop where I'd bought a new kitchen knife. FML

#16657844
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34356) - you deserved it (3317)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:47am - misc - by lalala (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I discovered that the medicated eye drops I have been taking to fight a mild eye infection show up under black lights when I walked into a party and the whole left side of my face was glowing. FML

#4763685
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30067) - you deserved it (3316)

On 08/23/2009 at 6:24pm - misc - by SummerGirl0009 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my sister broke up with her boyfriend of 4 years because he hadn't "popped" the question. I've just spent the last 2 months helping him plan the perfect proposal. FML

#5312576
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45975) - you deserved it (3316)

On 09/17/2009 at 1:44pm - love - by Sadtimes - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I missed my flight. Why? My niece thought it would be funny to empty out my suitcase and hide inside. FML

#4226931
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49068) - you deserved it (3316)

On 08/02/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Korea Republic of (Inch'on-jikhalsi)

Today, I witnessed my drunk grandmother attempting the Single Ladies dance, complete with hip gyrations and ass slapping. FML

#7125944
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29578) - you deserved it (3316)

On 01/03/2010 at 1:06pm - misc - by ohdear (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, after recently moving to America as I've always dreamt of, I saw my first, majestic deer. My boyfriend slammed it with the rental car. FML

#18400487
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26800) - you deserved it (3316)

On 12/01/2011 at 12:41am - misc - by AmericanDream (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after my son graduated from nursing school which I, as a single parent, paid for with blood, sweat, and tears, during his grad party he was asked what his next step was. His response was, "Eh, I kinda realized I hate nursing." FML

#18060058
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35300) - you deserved it (3316)

On 10/24/2011 at 12:22am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after a great treadmill run at my gym, I noticed a stain on my clothing. Apparently my nipple chafed so badly that it bled through my white t-shirt, and I'd walked around the gym completely oblivious. FML

#17898016
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25689) - you deserved it (3316)

On 10/03/2011 at 7:19pm - health - by sorenips - Canada (Quebec)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • Thank tinselled-Christ that that's finished! Christmas 2014 is finally over. We can finally stop grumbling about the endless songs about snow, put the presents away in a closet (or a dumpster) and…

Friday 26 December 2014

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