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Today, I had a dream that my ex-boyfriend had become a vicious serial killer and was hunting me down because I broke up with him. I don't know what scares me more: the way he hunted me in my sleep, or the fact that it wouldn't surprise me if it actually happened. FML

#19958664
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22751) - you deserved it (3450)

On 07/19/2012 at 11:55am - love - by InsomniacToBe - United States (Utah)

Today, I was rejected by a company I applied to. When I was writing my application, I spent so much time on their website researching that the ads on my browser are almost all for their products. It's like getting rejected again with every click. FML

#21227193
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33786) - you deserved it (3450)

On 08/01/2014 at 11:23pm - work - by heartfelt - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I ran into my crush of three years ago. We used to always walk our dogs together. He still remembered my dog's name. He didn't remember mine. FML

#3168313
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49324) - you deserved it (3449)

On 06/24/2009 at 6:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, I found out that my mom doesn't know my phone number, but she does know the names of both of David Hasselhoff's daughters. FML

#14102213
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20108) - you deserved it (3449)

On 12/06/2010 at 12:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I finally started my job as an in-home caregiver. The man I was hired to care for died two hours after I made it to his house. FML

#15834810
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41508) - you deserved it (3449)

On 04/18/2011 at 3:24pm - work - by nurseITHINKNOT - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML

#20097870
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27109) - you deserved it (3449)

On 10/02/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend breaking things off with me. He waited until the day after Christmas because he wanted all his presents. And he got me nothing. FML

#20423285
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44268) - you deserved it (3449)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:32am - love - by Jolene - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my in-laws came for dinner. My 5-year-old son chose that as the perfect time to say, "Good girls always swallow!" when my daughter coughed up some of her food. I have no idea where he heard it, but my mother-in-law blamed me, and my wife had to convince her not to call CPS on me. FML

#20689805
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46039) - you deserved it (3449)

On 05/27/2013 at 6:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, at my wedding, the minister forgot to skip the "does anyone object?" part. My mother stood up and gave a lengthy reason, which caused my future in-laws to start shouting. It turned into a small riot, and no, we're not married now. FML

#20721430
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64246) - you deserved it (3449)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, even though I don't necessarily believe in soul mates, I found out my wife does. She met hers a few weeks ago. FML

#20896483
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43290) - you deserved it (3449)

On 09/26/2013 at 2:54am - love - by NotTheSoulMate (man) - United States

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28770) - you deserved it (3449)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, as I awoke, the sun was shining, the birds were tweeting, and police sirens were wailing at a drug bust next door. FML

#21234535
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39700) - you deserved it (3449)

On 08/11/2014 at 1:11am - misc - by Ithoughtheywerenormalpeople (man) - United States (Texas)



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