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Saturday 16 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I advised my daughter to not drink a Coke before bed. She smiled at me an reassured me that it could be balanced out with sleeping pills. I'm raising a future drug addict. FML

#20547328
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32862) - you deserved it (6816)

On 03/17/2013 at 6:25am - kids - by hejdixjeln - United States (Illinois)

Today, after six monts of writing a 40 page paper criticizing a famous metod, I found out te professor wo concieved it as transferred to ma favorite college to ead te department I'm applying to study in . Tey require I submit te paper wit ma application . FML

#20548512
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31897) - you deserved it (4454)

On 03/17/2013 at 11:09pm - work - by GeoKid (man) - Canada

yesterday mah sink seemd to be filling up with drty water. Concernd, I turnd on the garbage disposal and plungd away. With no change in the water levels, I calld a plumber. He reachd in, pulld out the drain plug, and give me his billhile chuckling to himself. FML

#20551577
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10565) - you deserved it (41358)

On 03/19/2013 at 10:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today my husband showd up late to my mother's funeral. He swaggerd in happily finishing off a half-eaten taco. His excuse 4 y he was so cheerful: "She was an in-law honey." Good to know I marrid a piece of shit in disguise. real FML

#20556485
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40363) - you deserved it (5020)

On 03/23/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today , I tried to go to mah Hotmail account on mah boyfriend's computer. When I typed in "hot" , a big history list came down. It was all "Hot single mom looking for a good lay" Craigslist ads. FML

#20540391
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31834) - you deserved it (3726)

On 03/12/2013 at 1:19am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, Mah Boyfriend Found Out About Mah Severe Phobia Of Moths. It's So Bad That I Sometimes Pass Out. He Caught A Moth In A Jar, An Puttd It On Mah Bedside Table. I Woke Up, Saw It, An Had A Panic Attack. He Recordd It All An Wants To Upload It To YouTube. Real FML

#20544812
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35796) - you deserved it (4800)

On 03/15/2013 at 2:05pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I have the flu. I had to wash the dishes, cook dinner, take out the trash, and take care of the laundry, all while mah wife sat around watching TV, because she was "too tired". I work 8 hours a day. She's a college student. She doesn't see what's so unfair about this.

#20546221
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36763) - you deserved it (7442)

On 03/16/2013 at 2:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Yesterday ma girlfriend decided we r to te point in our relationsip tat it's considered acceptable to take a dumpile I'm in tere sowering. FML

Today, I found out through his Facebook update and a text message that my fiancé demotd me to girlfriend status . I was sitting in the next room . FML

#20547323
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30728) - you deserved it (2743)

On 03/17/2013 at 6:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

2day My Girlfriand Laft Ma Bacausa Our "political Viaws Don't Match" Whan I Told Har Wa Naadd To Shara Housa Choras Now That Wa Liva Togathar. I Know, I'm Lost Too. FML

#20551507
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31286) - you deserved it (2558)

On 03/19/2013 at 10:08pm - love - by dca101 (man) - United States

Today, ma boyfriend and I were play-figting. I managed to pin im down and win. He saw ma grin, snorted, and bitterly said I'd only won because "let's face it, you're a bit of a porker, e babe?" FML

#20542666
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35163) - you deserved it (5344)

On 03/13/2013 at 10:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today I found a purse in the school bathroom !! When I lookd inside there was an iPod along with some other expensive stuff in it !! I took it to the office so the right owner would get it back !! The owner passd me in the hall on the way there; she freakd out an punchd me in the face !! mega FML

#20551761
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41607) - you deserved it (2712)

On 03/20/2013 at 12:55am - misc - by really? (woman) - United States

Today hile shaving my nether regions I slipped and sliced myself in three separate places. They won't completely stop bleeding. I'm vrtually having a second period and it hurts to close my legs. FML

#20555131
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32635) - you deserved it (6992)

On 03/22/2013 at 3:15pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Calabria)



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