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Friday 15 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, for the sixth time in a row, I was driving my kid to school and he made me late for work. Why? He was whacking off instead of getting ready. FML

#20551973
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44766) - you deserved it (6218)

On 03/20/2013 at 7:07am - intimacy - by Why son, why? (man) - United States

Today, a pregnant friend who is due in 2 weeks posted a picture of a baby on Facebook. I commented congratulations. She's still pregnant. It was a picture of her baby who died 3 years ago. FML

#20553352
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49407) - you deserved it (11591)

On 03/21/2013 at 5:42am - kids - by seamonkeys - United States

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

#20555435
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37820) - you deserved it (18109)

On 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my brother yelled at me, calling me a "no-good fucking whore", because I couldn't fix his laptop. The same laptop he threw on the floor after screaming "FUCKING HEAL MEEE!" at his game. As ever, my parents took his side, refusing to believe that I can't fix a cracked monitor. FML

#20539298
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40085) - you deserved it (2488)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:57am - misc - by cunts, cunts everywhere - Australia

Today, my 4-year-old daughter couldn't sleep, crying that her teddy bear wants to eat her. My husband thought it would be funny to put the bear right in front of her face while she slept. She's now terrified to sleep anywhere but in our bed. FML

#20539958
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32823) - you deserved it (6058)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend, whom I haven't heard from in a whole month, turned up at my door because it was apparently "steak and blowjob day." FML

#20543142
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46287) - you deserved it (8064)

On 03/14/2013 at 5:02am - intimacy - by howaboutno (woman) - United States

Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing my feelings to a girl I really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML

#20545151
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33588) - you deserved it (2993)

On 03/15/2013 at 6:43pm - love - by forever single, I guess (man) - United States

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I started singing and harmonizing with the vacuum cleaner. FML

#20551821
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25659) - you deserved it (4302)

On 03/20/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, I went out to Applebees with a girl I like and a group of friends. Someone asked if the girl and I were dating. She instantly replied with a bit of disgust "What? No way, never!" It would have been nice to know before paying for the last ten or so dates we went on. FML

Today, being too poor to buy makeup, I walked into Macy's and "tested" some products out, just so I could look nice for my job interview. FML

#20541897
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37196) - you deserved it (4409)

On 03/13/2013 at 9:47am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I invited my long-lost best friend over, because I haven't seen her much since she got a new boyfriend. 20 minutes into hanging out, he showed up at my door. He still hasn't left, and they're having sex on my couch right now. FML

#20540616
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55436) - you deserved it (7172)

On 03/12/2013 at 9:22am - intimacy - by kenleybunch - United States (North Carolina)

Today, as always, I'm dating one of the few girls who, without fail, always finishes first when we get intimate. She's also one of those girlfriends who doesn't want to continue once she's done. FML

#20542189
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47357) - you deserved it (7697)

On 03/13/2013 at 3:51pm - intimacy - by WhyDoINeedAName - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. The movie was in 3D, and he couldn't help but notice it would be much cooler if you could feel what the characters did. He spent the next two hours slapping me every time the person in the movie did, claiming the movie would be "better". FML

#20542280
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32136) - you deserved it (5781)

On 03/13/2013 at 5:06pm - misc - by bruised - Canada (New Brunswick)



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