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Sunday 3 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my teacher read my story about a haunted house for a class assignment. She liked it very much and turned it in to the office to be sent into a state writing competition. An hour later, I was called to the office where the guidance counselor called my work "disturbing" and said I "need help". FML

#20535562
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34609) - you deserved it (2642)

On 03/08/2013 at 6:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, during a sleepover at my friend's house, I woke up in the middle of the night with a dire need to pee. As I walked in the dark to the bathroom, I saw a silhouette in a doorway and instictively screamed. Turns out it was my friend's sister's One Direction cutout. FML

#20525715
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24913) - you deserved it (4342)

On 02/28/2013 at 2:00pm - misc - by Neversleepingthereagain (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my college started an internet "confessions" page. Out of curiosity I checked it out, only to find that it's full of some of the most disturbing stuff I've ever read. My schoolmates are either filthy as fuck or they are all pathological liars. Wonderful. FML

#20524030
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33352) - you deserved it (4665)

On 02/27/2013 at 2:17am - intimacy - by panicelement (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML

#20537800
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32020) - you deserved it (8455)

On 03/10/2013 at 3:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my step-mom stole over $100 in cash from me, dumped dirty cat litter all over my clean bed sheets, and called me a whore for having a polite conversation with my boyfriend. I confronted my father about it. He told me to forgive her, because she's "on her period." FML

#20533543
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41617) - you deserved it (2541)

On 03/06/2013 at 2:11pm - misc - by disgruntled stepdaughter - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was walking to my professor's office. I've had an upset stomach all week, and I still felt a little gassy, so I politely decided to pass gass before entering the room. More than just gas came out. FML

Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML

#20536715
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42284) - you deserved it (2708)

On 03/09/2013 at 5:35am - love - by Quiteannoyed (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I went to the store to pick up some feminine products. As I was paying, the male cashier looked at me sympathetically and asked if it was my girlfriend's time of the month. I'm a girl and was buying them for myself. FML

#20533390
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36224) - you deserved it (4131)

On 03/06/2013 at 9:53am - health - by ghgfd - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was about to open a door at school, a student opened it and hit me. As I recovered and was about to open it again, someone else opened the door, hitting me again. Everyone laughed. FML

#20527903
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33075) - you deserved it (3447)

On 03/02/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by Doors Hate Me - United States

Today, I walked outside to this guy attempting to steal my bike. When I asked him what he was doing he calmly replied, "I'm a bike inspector. You hooked your chain all wrong! This time is a warning; next time it'll be a ticket!" He then threw his full, opened Pepsi can at me. FML

#20524651
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27867) - you deserved it (2269)

On 02/27/2013 at 5:39pm - misc - by Chelsea - United States (Ohio)

Today, instead of actually teaching us something, our college professor excitedly showed us the godawful Harlem Shake video he made with his friends. FML

#20533295
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33096) - you deserved it (4692)

On 03/06/2013 at 6:51am - work - by Will this stupid fad ever end? (man) - United States

Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML

#20526049
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29920) - you deserved it (9253)

On 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he may have an STD. When I asked who he was with before me, and where it might have come from, he listed off almost every single one of my friends. FML

#20532270
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37142) - you deserved it (5086)

On 03/05/2013 at 1:57pm - health - by Anonymous - United States



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