Wednesday 20 February 2013 
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Today, my husband and I were fooling around in the shower. For some reason, I thought it'd be a good idea to grab his man meat and show him how to wash someone at a nursing home. He said he'd never be turned on by a nurse again. I'm a nurse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8281) - you deserved it (25173)
On 02/21/2013 at 12:51am - love - by tomedicalforlove -
Today, I went back home after seeing the doctor, I told my boyfriend my new medicine might cause some mood swings. He immediately grabbed his phone and pretended to take a call, then rushed out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18365) - you deserved it (2037)
On 02/21/2013 at 8:21pm - health - by NewDrugs (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, after half a year of flirting back and forth, I went to a fancy party thrown by the guy I really like. He met me at the door and introduced me to everyone as, "the lovely Meghan". I thought I finally had a chance, until he introduced me to his girlfriend of five years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24338) - you deserved it (3743)
On 02/21/2013 at 8:33pm - love - by Meghan (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend of almost six years asked me to move in with him. I assumed he meant that he was finally moving out of his parents' house and had found a place for us to live. No, it turns out he means he wants me to move in with him at his parents' place. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25500) - you deserved it (3768)
On 02/24/2013 at 12:48am - love - by great_just_great (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I realised the extent of my wife's cat obsession when I received an $850 bill for the air conditioner she leaves on for our 5 cats while we are at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19904) - you deserved it (2448)
On 02/27/2013 at 2:12am - animals - by thecatlady (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I purchased a box of girl scout cookies from a coworker. I wanted to save them for later at home, so I placed them on my desk and then headed to a meeting. When I returned, there was an empty box sitting there with a post-it note saying, "Thanks!" Nobody will own up to it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20249) - you deserved it (4057)
On 02/18/2013 at 8:49pm - work - by erockinthesuburb (man) - United States
Today, I uploaded a new Facebook profile photo, which got over 20 likes in the space of an hour. The most I've ever gotten before was 10. Surprised, I went to check my picture again, only to notice two guys were sarcastically flipping me the bird in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21995) - you deserved it (5596)
Today, I found out that my mom has linked my iPhone with her iPad and has been secretly reading my texts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29159) - you deserved it (2519)
On 02/27/2013 at 7:27pm - misc - by segal1010 - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8514) - you deserved it (24173)
On 02/18/2013 at 2:11pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I muted the TV just in time to hear my mom yell at my dad about how their sex life is "non-existent". FML
I agree, your life sucks (24189) - you deserved it (2195)
On 02/22/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by PoorMe - United States
Today, my girlfriend of nine months made a huge scene in public, calling me a "cheating bastard" because she saw me with another woman at the library. That "other woman" is my Calculus tutor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24882) - you deserved it (2041)
On 02/20/2013 at 1:20pm - love - by ? - United States (California)
Today, my mom refused to sign me up for a CPR class, reasoning that if I was ever put in a situation where a person was choking, I could save them using my "common sense" and "intellect". I need the class to graduate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23941) - you deserved it (1503)
On 02/20/2013 at 7:32pm - misc - by blob - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went to the doctor to get a blood test and I started crying when I saw the needle. I planned on becoming a doctor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18907) - you deserved it (1764)
On 02/24/2013 at 4:34am - health - by Caroline - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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