Tuesday 12 February 2013 
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Today, I was hanging out with the guy I really like. I lifted my arms to put my hair in a ponytail when he noticed a hole that had apparently tore in the armpit of my shirt, so he put his finger through it. I haven't shaved in weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13636) - you deserved it (36562)
On 02/19/2013 at 1:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while on my way to the movies, I stopped at a gas station to pick up candy so I could avoid the high prices at the movies. The guy who tore my ticket asked for my purse, confiscated my candy, and then kicked me out of the movie theater. That guy was my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38200) - you deserved it (5706)
On 02/17/2013 at 10:50am - love - by Cheyennereed - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I got married on Skyrim. To an elf. While in real life, my love life is floundering like a half-dead carp in the surf on a hot day. So much so in fact that I actually draw a measure of comfort from being married to an elf. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18540) - you deserved it (7050)
On 02/11/2013 at 2:19am - love - by mr_loveless (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he found out my birthday is the same day as his, and he thinks we are twins who were separated at birth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32761) - you deserved it (1965)
On 02/13/2013 at 5:09pm - love - by okay then (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I went to the market to buy some groceries. Before I got even half-way home, a guy stormed toward me, pulled what looked like a knife, and chased me around the block while screaming that he'd kill me for sleeping with his wife. Nope, still a 15-year-old virgin here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28216) - you deserved it (1299)
On 02/14/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah)
Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8470) - you deserved it (23926)
On 02/11/2013 at 9:30pm - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (New York)
Today, while at the store with my mom, we ran into the girl I recently confessed to being interested in. My mom decided to shout, "IS THAT HER?! IS THAT THE GIRL YOU LIKE?!" Embarrassed, I desperately told her to be quiet. She grounded me for being "rude" to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27458) - you deserved it (2093)
On 02/15/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)
Today, the guy I like and his friend came home with me to work on a project. I opened my front door and my mum was at the top of the stairs completely naked, bent over, drying her hair with the hairdryer. It took a few moments for her to realise we were there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25579) - you deserved it (1683)
On 02/13/2013 at 6:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (North Ayrshire)
Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23470) - you deserved it (4933)
On 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm - money - by an idiot (man) - Australia
Today, I met my mother's deeply religious fiancé for the first time. His response upon seeing me was to look me square in the eye and say, "You'll need to take out that nose stud or I'm afraid you'll not be welcome in our home." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29261) - you deserved it (2723)
On 02/19/2013 at 2:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, for the second time this week, I was asked to stop putting on such an obviously fake "British" accent. I am British and have lived here all my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27250) - you deserved it (1855)
On 02/19/2013 at 1:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shocked, I quickly tried to explain it away with, "That was my shoe." I was barefoot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9851) - you deserved it (21273)
On 02/12/2013 at 9:18am - love - by gassy - United States
Today, a cute girl asked if my dog was available for a date on Valentine's Day. Thinking I was in luck, I asked if I should come along. She said no. My dog has better game than I do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (203) - you deserved it (1753)
On 02/12/2013 at 4:50pm - animals - by Doggotmytongue - United States (Illinois)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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