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Saturday 9 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I walked past a few of my coworkers sitting outside smoking. As I got a whiff of the smoke, I coughed. They immediately started to defend their habit, and I was told to "mind my own fucking business." I wasn't trying to be rude; I'm actually allergic to cigarette smoke. FML

#20507668
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32581) - you deserved it (3571)

On 02/15/2013 at 12:53am - health - by youmindyourownbusiness - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad lost his mind over the meteorite incident in Russia. He's convinced that it's part of some big government conspiracy to cover up a UFO crash-landing, and now he won't stop dismissively calling us "sheep" and telling us "do the research" just because we don't agree with him. FML

#20508499
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23508) - you deserved it (2759)

On 02/15/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by dadsadipshit - United States

Today, as I was walking to my car, I noticed a car with a tail light out. Trying to be a good citizen, I walked up to the driver's side door and said "excuse me". The lady then maced me through the open window. FML

#20494408
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25896) - you deserved it (2995)

On 02/05/2013 at 12:45pm - health - by maced face - United States

Today, I won $50 on the lottery. On the subway home, I checked my pocket to see if the money was still there. A very professional man in a suit yelled, "Hey, that's mine!" I got several dirty glares. I'm such a pathetic wimp that I gave him the money. FML

#20497390
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12659) - you deserved it (49617)

On 02/07/2013 at 7:28pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after much coaxing, I finally got my roommate to loosen up and have a couple of beers with me and my friends. It was only later in the evening that he admitted the real reason he hadn't wanted to drink: he's an alcoholic and had been sober for six months, until now. FML

#20499970
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15151) - you deserved it (53900)

On 02/09/2013 at 6:26pm - misc - by mhmm... cumsquats (man) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, I got my very first yeast infection. Thinking she would help me, I went to my mom. Instead she began yelling about how I'm lying and it's an STD and I don't believe in the power of Jesus. FML

#20503942
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31408) - you deserved it (2614)

On 02/12/2013 at 6:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband decided to start seeing other people. I found out when I called and interrupted his date. FML

#20495369
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33974) - you deserved it (2225)

On 02/06/2013 at 3:04am - love - by MyLife (woman) -

Today, my manager asked me for the password to my Internet so she could Skype family since she can't pay her bill. This is the same woman who just a week ago tried to evict me because my rent was an hour late. Trying to be the bigger person, I gave her the password. She changed my password. FML

#20496640
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30847) - you deserved it (16331)

On 02/07/2013 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I casually mentioned to my dad that it was the Chinese New Year yesterday. He accused me of insulting his intelligence by "making stupid shit up." I explained that it's real, and that we just use the Gregorian calendar, hence the different dates. He responded by grounding me. FML

#20501411
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29340) - you deserved it (4041)

On 02/10/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by must be adopted (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was making lunch, when my two-year-old ran up to me and handed me an empty bottle of baby powder. I soon realized I'd be spending the rest of my day cleaning the entire house. FML

Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML

#20505035
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27902) - you deserved it (5642)

On 02/13/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by please leave... - United States (Texas)

Today, just so my family would think someone might actually be interested in me, I bought myself roses and attached a secret admirer card to them. My plan would have worked if I hadn't forgotten to take the receipt off the kitchen counter. FML

#20506184
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10195) - you deserved it (38779)

On 02/14/2013 at 8:18am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, after explaining to my four-year-old why our new puppy was peeing on things to mark his territory, my son decided to follow suit and pee all over our house. FML

#20509972
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25700) - you deserved it (6120)

On 02/16/2013 at 9:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



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