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Saturday 26 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML

#20490582
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48107) - you deserved it (3330)

On 02/02/2013 at 6:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Belgium

Today, my school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML

#20474800
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31167) - you deserved it (5172)

On 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my school's ski trip got canceled, because "All the snow makes the roads unsafe." We can't go skiing because it's snowing. FML

#20478441
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35214) - you deserved it (2907)

On 01/25/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was upset because my brother, who I'm very close to, didn't call me for my birthday yesterday. I told my mom about it, and we both immediately went silent on the phone, as we both realized she forgot to call me yesterday as well. FML

#20474927
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42429) - you deserved it (3422)

On 01/23/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by birthday_loser (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML

#20479641
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26563) - you deserved it (43610)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my mother burst into tears and hysterics when she found out my fiancée and I were not "pure" for our upcoming wedding. I'm 28, she's 27, and we've lived together for four years. FML

#20472693
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32149) - you deserved it (4575)

On 01/22/2013 at 3:09am - love - by deflower (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend tried to hypnotize me into breaking up with him. FML

#20485216
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30524) - you deserved it (3135)

On 01/29/2013 at 7:28pm - love - by theawfulpresent (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I tripped while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reached out and grabbed onto one of the guys walking up. I ended up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgusted glares as I dusted myself off. FML

#20489268
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22697) - you deserved it (7136)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:53pm - health - by Awkward (man) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, after 2 weeks of not having sex, my pregnant girlfriend and I finally fooled around. This was immediately followed by her bursting into tears and begging me to make her a ham steak. FML

#20490079
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39891) - you deserved it (9220)

On 02/02/2013 at 9:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I blew a huge gum bubble. My cat was on my lap and decided to shove her face in the bubble. There's gum all over her, and I still have scars from the last time I tried bathe her. FML

#20484695
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24786) - you deserved it (9191)

On 01/29/2013 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, my 5-year-old nephew had the most amazing idea: to play a game with my keys. He took out all ten keys individually and hid them around the house. So far it's been two hours and I haven't found a single one. FML

#20485810
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31239) - you deserved it (3664)

On 01/30/2013 at 2:03am - kids - by idislikeblanks (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my parents that what I'd really like for my 21st birthday is the 1865 edition of the Memoirs of Saint-Simon in 22 volumes that I found online for $200, and have been wanting for months. They laughed and said, "Yeah, right. We'll get you an iPhone and perhaps you'll become normal." FML

#20488681
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34389) - you deserved it (9154)

On 02/01/2013 at 4:19am - misc - by HistoryFreak (woman) - France

Today, I came home in a really good mood, and I greeted my husband with a grin and a "Hi, babe!" He just muttered, "Why can't you just DIE?" and continued playing his video game. FML

#20490556
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38423) - you deserved it (4967)

On 02/02/2013 at 5:34pm - love - by rani (woman) - Norway (Oslo)



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