Wednesday 23 January 2013 
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Today, I took an IQ test and ended up scoring above average. Feeling good about myself, I decided to bake some cookies. After 30 minutes of them not doing anything in the oven, I realized I forgot to turn the oven on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13513) - you deserved it (21165)
On 01/24/2013 at 12:16am - misc - by steven - United States (California)
Today, while video chatting with my girlfriend, who lives on the other side of the country, I thought I'd play a song for her on my guitar. The string broke and hit me in the face. I burst into tears and had to hang up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26962) - you deserved it (5682)
On 01/21/2013 at 12:04pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24675) - you deserved it (3874)
On 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my school's ski trip got canceled, because "All the snow makes the roads unsafe." We can't go skiing because it's snowing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29539) - you deserved it (2119)
On 01/25/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend tried to hypnotize me into breaking up with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24281) - you deserved it (2622)
On 01/29/2013 at 7:28pm - love - by theawfulpresent (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19366) - you deserved it (29936)
On 01/26/2013 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, my mother burst into tears and hysterics when she found out my fiancée and I were not "pure" for our upcoming wedding. I'm 28, she's 27, and we've lived together for four years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24537) - you deserved it (2890)
On 01/22/2013 at 3:09am - love - by deflower (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was upset because my brother, who I'm very close to, didn't call me for my birthday yesterday. I told my mom about it, and we both immediately went silent on the phone, as we both realized she forgot to call me yesterday as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34313) - you deserved it (2279)
On 01/23/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by birthday_loser (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got my retainer fitted. It stimulates my gag reflex so badly that I gag every time I try so say anything with a 'P' in it. My orthodontist laughed and suggested I get a thesaurus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22701) - you deserved it (1487)
On 01/30/2013 at 2:52am - health - by Miss Blairgowrie (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25811) - you deserved it (2450)
On 01/26/2013 at 3:44pm - work - by FUCK THE PIGS (man) - United States (California)
Today, my sister's boyfriend called while she was out. The second I answered he tried to have phone sex with me. When I explained to him that I wasn't my sister and that we just sound the same on the phone, he replied, "Don't care, let's keep going." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34113) - you deserved it (2323)
On 01/29/2013 at 4:40am - intimacy - by Awkward... (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my 5-year-old nephew had the most amazing idea: to play a game with my keys. He took out all ten keys individually and hid them around the house. So far it's been two hours and I haven't found a single one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25497) - you deserved it (3121)
On 01/30/2013 at 2:03am - kids - by idislikeblanks (man) - United States (California)
Today, at work at a car dealership, a seemingly overzealous customer shook my hand vigorously after we finalized a deal. I didn't think anything of it until a coworker pointed out that he was just trying to make my breasts jiggle. I'm a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23323) - you deserved it (5151)
On 01/22/2013 at 7:29pm - work - by milkshake - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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