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Friday 18 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was the last person in line for going on the bus. Incidentally, I was right behind a guy way taller and wider than me. When he got on the bus, the bus driver immediately shut the door behind him. I was left outside chasing after the bus. FML

#20462065
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25619) - you deserved it (1434)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I woke up following one of the worst nightmares of my life. I was sweating, clutching the sheets, and feeling sick to the stomach. I'd been dreaming of my wedding that's taking place next week. FML

#20468290
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24901) - you deserved it (5906)

On 01/19/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I was reading a book in bed when my dad came to check whether or not I was asleep. To avoid any conversation, I pretended that I was. Turns out he was just checking whether he and my mom could have sex while I was fast asleep. I couldn't plug my ears in time. FML

#20468586
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22045) - you deserved it (6804)

On 01/19/2013 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I went on a date with a co-worker I've been interested in for some time. The topic of discussion she chose over lunch: how she's living a double-life as an escort in Flint and that she thinks she's picked up an STD from unprotected sex. FML

#20472998
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26208) - you deserved it (3095)

On 01/22/2013 at 12:20pm - love - by SonofDonald (man) - United States

Today, while living in Florida, I had a conversation with my mother explaining that it might be best for me to come back home. Her response, "Don't worry, they have plenty of homeless shelters down there if you need a place to stay." Thanks Mom. FML

#20458436
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22425) - you deserved it (2442)

On 01/14/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by living_thedream (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. The first thing my dad did was comment that given how pretty she looked in our photos, and compared to how she looks in real life, she's amazing at using Photoshop. FML

#20466661
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24929) - you deserved it (2290)

On 01/18/2013 at 6:03pm - love - by dpap - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was driving and noticed a police car parked in a spot reserved for the handicapped. I stopped my car and got out to take a picture. The cop gave me a ticket for parking in the road. FML

#20467308
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13617) - you deserved it (29486)

On 01/19/2013 at 1:14am - money - by LaLince (man) - Switzerland

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I met with my Bolivian friend, who's vacationing here for a few weeks. Eager to show him how welcoming we are in the USA, I took him home and introduced him to my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Bolivia? That's in Europe, right? We saved your asses in World War 2." FML

#20477083
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23361) - you deserved it (2555)

On 01/24/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by oh ffs (man) - United States

Today, I felt like going to the gym. I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to come with me. She screamed at me for supposedly implying that she's fat. No, I just wanted to go to the gym with someone. FML

#20458971
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29375) - you deserved it (5074)

On 01/14/2013 at 1:34pm - love - by nkotz - United States

Today, an elderly gentleman came into my store complaining of a toothache, so I showed him where the Orajel was located. He then insisted on making a big scene, claiming that I really had the magic touch and if I would just stroke his cheek all his pain would go away. FML

#20464379
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22255) - you deserved it (1879)

On 01/17/2013 at 11:57am - work - by lifebecrazed (woman) -

Today, I was walking towards a party where I knew my cheating ex would be. I passionately rehearsed how I would have a go at him big time when I met him. Guess who was walking right behind me and heard it all. FML

#20465975
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10320) - you deserved it (27482)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:55am - love - by Shuttie (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, I found out that my home-made pasta sauce had a weird taste to it because my basil patch in the backyard has become my dog's preferred spot to pee. FML

#20467403
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25621) - you deserved it (4967)

On 01/19/2013 at 2:40am - animals - by damnthedog (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, someone broke into my car by smashing the driver's side window. I'd be less irritated if they had just used the door handle; the lock has been broken for years. FML

#20467580
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22735) - you deserved it (2170)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:14am - money - by Perplexed - United States (South Dakota)



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