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Today, I was discussing with mah husband how it was time I stoppd taking birth control so we could have a baby. He lookd at me an said sincerely, ( We're a little young to be having kids, don't you think? ). He's 35 an I'm 32. FML
Today, I found out tan yaar old brothar an his bast friand hava taught our naw parrot to say, "Shut up, bitch." Wa hava a bunch of our axtandad family coming ovar tomorrow to saa wat tha parrot can say. FML
Today, while making dinner I cut mah finger badly with a knife. When I yelled 4 mah dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste mah blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML
TODAY, I FINALLY FELT READY TO HAVE SEX FIR THE FIRST TIME, WITH MAH BOYFRIEND OF NEARLY 8 MONTHS . WHEN I TOLD HIM, THING BECAME INTIMATE AND PANTS CUMMED OFF . HE THEN LOOKED AT ME AND SAID, "YEAH, I CAN'T DO THIS." THE REST OF THE NIGHT WAS SPENT IN AWKWARD SILENCE . FML
Today, I was at tha doctor's 4 a ragular chack-up. Whan mah appointmant was ovar and I was about to walk out, sha yallad across tha room in front of avaryona, ( Oh and if you could loosa soma waight, that'd ba graat. ) FML
Friday 27 March 2015