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Thursday 10 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after months of searching and several emotional breakdowns, I finally found a new job. My wife's words of encouragement? "Try not to fuck this one up." FML

#20464089
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30457) - you deserved it (9121)

On 01/17/2013 at 5:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, one of my paintings was accepted into a local art gallery. It would've been a dream come true, had my "best friend" not submitted it under her own name and taken all the credit. FML

#20453750
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39453) - you deserved it (2767)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while trying to quietly sneak a midnight snack with my girlfriend, I was slowly opening the pantry door so I wouldn't wake my mother. My girlfriend came and swung open the door onto my foot, taking the top layer of skin with it. FML

#20456813
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30480) - you deserved it (4791)

On 01/13/2013 at 7:41am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was the last person in line for going on the bus. Incidentally, I was right behind a guy way taller and wider than me. When he got on the bus, the bus driver immediately shut the door behind him. I was left outside chasing after the bus. FML

#20462065
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33332) - you deserved it (2205)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, while at work, a Beatles song came on the radio. I jokingly said, "These guys are pretty good, are they new?" Everyone thought I was being serious, and now they're convinced I'm an idiot. FML

#20446711
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17464) - you deserved it (34253)

On 01/07/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by EffUrEll - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I let my friend bleach my hair, which resulted in it falling out in clumps. I spent $150 at the beauty salon fixing it and cutting most of it off. I sent the pictures of my new hair to my friends, and I got the same reply from each and every one of them: "That better be a wig." FML

#20463998
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18209) - you deserved it (27564)

On 01/17/2013 at 2:53am - misc - by goodlord12 (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend of a year asked me to move in with him. I would have been touched at this gesture, had he not asked in the form of a text message, saying: "Got kicked out. Wanna get a flat or something?" FML

#20447722
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29825) - you deserved it (3574)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:31am - love - by movingbuddy (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I waited over an hour for my bus. As I finally saw it approaching, I reached into my purse to grab my ticket. The lady next to me then gave the driver a hand signal to keep driving. FML

#20451303
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34840) - you deserved it (2818)

On 01/10/2013 at 1:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while living in Florida, I had a conversation with my mother explaining that it might be best for me to come back home. Her response, "Don't worry, they have plenty of homeless shelters down there if you need a place to stay." Thanks Mom. FML

#20458436
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29442) - you deserved it (3490)

On 01/14/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by living_thedream (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my dad made a voodoo doll out of a melon. This seems to happen a lot. FML

#20449532
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23223) - you deserved it (2563)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, trying to be sweet, I told my girlfriend that I'm so happy we met one another. She muttered, "Well, that makes one of us." FML

#20453944
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29535) - you deserved it (2844)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:22pm - misc - by wtf did i do?? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my sleep-walking is so bad that I regularly text my friend while I sleep. I have no idea how many times this has happened. FML

#20455938
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26163) - you deserved it (3289)

On 01/12/2013 at 8:30pm - health - by I'm screwed - Canada (Alberta)

Today, management told me that I couldn't have a doorbell on my door. How did they get my attention to tell me this? By ringing my doorbell. FML

#20462282
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28966) - you deserved it (3017)

On 01/16/2013 at 7:21am - misc - by pigtails (woman) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)



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