Tuesday 8 January 2013 
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Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33700) - you deserved it (6050)
On 01/15/2013 at 4:58pm - intimacy - by itsrathersmall (woman) - United States (North Dakota)
Today, I woke up after sleeping with my boyfriend for the first time. I rolled over and smiled at him, and the first thing he said was, "You farted. A lot." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22905) - you deserved it (4104)
On 01/07/2013 at 10:40am - love - by gassy - United States (Texas)
Today, I saw Les Misérables. I was singing along to one of the songs when the guy next to me dumped his soda over my head and told me to shut up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13290) - you deserved it (82241)
On 01/08/2013 at 12:34am - misc - by maddiecat - United States (Missouri)
Today, my grandfather asked me why the broccoli I served for dinner was white. I told him it was cauliflower. He would't believe me, accused me of being a Russian spy, and stormed out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25734) - you deserved it (1832)
On 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by veggieluver (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was in the elevator, when a big bearded guy stepped in, wearing a dress. It's not an uncommon sight where I live, but my friend cracked up and asked him if he was wearing underwear. He took it as a challenge, and I can safely say that no, he was not. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26941) - you deserved it (4223)
On 01/10/2013 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by juvenile friends suck (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)
Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (30247) - you deserved it (654)
On 01/10/2013 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Amy (woman) - United States
Today, I walked into the bathroom only to see my boyfriend sitting on the floor eating ice cream, crying. I'd say I was shocked, but this isn't the first time it's happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26511) - you deserved it (4693)
On 01/14/2013 at 3:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Montana)
Today, I told my girlfriend that my identical twin and I are not in fact related, that he's adopted, and that the only reason we look exactly the same is because we eat and drink the same things. She actually believed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26260) - you deserved it (6503)
On 01/11/2013 at 12:20am - misc - by datingablonde - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my partner was inspired by 50 Shades Of Grey to try making me orgasm with a full bladder, therefore intensifying the experience. He was right, it was mind blowing. It also made me piss the bed for the first time in twenty-odd years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24834) - you deserved it (4788)
On 01/07/2013 at 8:01am - intimacy - by wetsheets (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)
Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie. An actor used the word "cunt", which prompted her to ask what that word meant in a loud "whisper". She followed up even more loudly with, "Does that mean pussy?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25427) - you deserved it (3288)
On 01/08/2013 at 12:10pm - misc - by troll of a gran - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13978) - you deserved it (23545)
On 01/12/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by nean83 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22191) - you deserved it (5716)
On 01/11/2013 at 2:09am - animals - by deadhammy (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16650) - you deserved it (4826)
On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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