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Sunday 6 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I unknowingly used my shampoo thinking it was leave-in-conditioner. While walking to work, it started to rain. I started to produce suds. FML

#20443594
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11011) - you deserved it (25780)

On 01/05/2013 at 10:59am - misc - by nomegusta (woman) - United States

Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML

#20455279
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35377) - you deserved it (8589)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, after 3 years with my dream girl, I decided to pop the question by making her complete a scavenger hunt ending in her finding me, suit and everything, by the park bench where we had our first kiss. She came home tired and, instead of following the clues, decided to watch TV all day. FML

#20444582
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32539) - you deserved it (4856)

On 01/06/2013 at 3:49am - love - by ItRainedOutside (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered after 11 months, my girlfriend is finally ready to have sex. I discovered this by walking in on her and one of my friends. FML

#20448085
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57472) - you deserved it (4323)

On 01/08/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by finallyready (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her, she really was a girl, and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34. FML

#20444863
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28855) - you deserved it (8390)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:24pm - love - by lifsabtch (man) -

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

#20434472
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40663) - you deserved it (3823)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:36pm - work - by shattysituation - United States

Today, I was having sex with my new boyfriend, and I realized that he enjoys making airplane sound effects while inserting himself inside of me. Moment ruined. FML

#20443434
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31601) - you deserved it (5359)

On 01/05/2013 at 4:21am - intimacy - by kblevss (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML

#20453156
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30457) - you deserved it (7865)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:09am - animals - by deadhammy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my mother telling my sister that she expects my marriage to fall apart any day now. Apparently, I have no concept of what "marriage" really means. My husband and I just celebrated our 7th anniversary, while my mother is planning her 5th wedding. FML

#20438192
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42816) - you deserved it (2036)

On 01/02/2013 at 5:31am - love - by alynna007 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I've been struggling with my English paper for the past hour, because I can't concentrate. This is because my mom is in the room next to me, singing to her pet rat about what a cute little boy he is, in between yelling at him to stop "molesting" her. FML

#20452365
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33885) - you deserved it (2816)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:02pm - animals - by theycallmekitty (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

#20445879
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22622) - you deserved it (6718)

On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband came home with a bunch of realistic-looking wigs for women. When I asked them what they were for, he said he wanted to spice up our sex life with them. When I told him I refused to wear a wig, he said in a very serious tone that I wasn't going to be the one wearing them, he was. FML

#20438198
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43551) - you deserved it (6639)

On 01/02/2013 at 5:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I took my girlfriend to go see Les Misérables. I tried to stay tough but completely lost it and started sobbing when Anne Hathaway began singing. My girlfriend called me a wimp and stayed dry-eyed throughout the whole movie. I'm dating a robot. FML

#20439162
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31932) - you deserved it (13992)

On 01/02/2013 at 6:38pm - misc - by Les Miserables is so sad (man) - Canada (Alberta)



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