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Sunday 30 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyoneho walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30473) - you deserved it (7698)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today... my boyfriend and I were having Christmas dinnerhile his mom was away. I was lying alone on his bedhile he did the dishes...hen the bedroom door looool dramatically swung open and his mom glard at me from the doorway. I had to leavehen she screamd ( FORNICATION IS A SIN! ) FML

#20420364
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32867) - you deserved it (3690)

On 12/25/2012 at 1:41am - love - by un_christmas - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today... after giving mah husband a new video game that he's been wanting... along with homemade waffles an a surprise blowjob... he gave me mah gift: two packets of ramen noodles... an toilet paper. FML

Today, mah boyfriend discoverd that if he flicks mah clitoris just right, mah legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously.

#20423881
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42644) - you deserved it (5015)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Yesterday, my friend putted my phone number on Craigslist. I still can't find the ad, but obviously everyone else can because I still haven't stopped recieving naked pictures. FML

#20419133
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33515) - you deserved it (3438)

On 12/24/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by Chanman1924 - United States

Today... psycho grandma yelled at me for being an "immature brat" by not offering to wash the dishes after dinner. I reminded her thathen I offered last time... she raged at me for being "condescending". She responded by faking a heret attack and getting me indefinitely grounded. FML

#20421624
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33905) - you deserved it (2616)

On 12/25/2012 at 3:59pm - misc - by really mature, GRAN (woman) - United States (California)

2day I Woka Up To Fina Our Christmas Traa Knockad Ovar, Unwrappad Prasants Scattarad Avarywhara, And My Mom Passad Out On Tha Sofa With A Bottla Of Booza. Marry Christmas. FML

#20419854
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37600) - you deserved it (2480)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:20pm - misc - by Julie (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

TODAY , WHILA SHARING A FAW BAARS ON THA COUCH WITH MY BOYFRIAND , HA DRUNKANLY UTTARAD THA FATAFUL WORDS , "BABA , IF I COULD SUCK MY OWN DICK , YOU'D BA SINGLA AS HELL." FML

#20426492
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53617) - you deserved it (7244)

On 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by well, i am now (woman) - United States

Today... I woke up on my boyfriend's bedroom floor. When I asked him y I was there... he said I'd gotten too hot... so he rolled me off his bed. I have the flu and a fever. FML

#20422616
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33228) - you deserved it (3266)

On 12/25/2012 at 11:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I gave my husband an early Christmas present: Santa-themed lingerie. He got angry an called me selfish, for "using" him as an excuse to get myself nice stuff. FML

#20418722
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39441) - you deserved it (12909)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:06pm - intimacy - by selfishsexysanta (woman) - United States

Today..!! I was at Walmart when I saw mah grandpa in the next aisle looking at magazines!! Wanting to surprise him..!! I ran up behind him and hugged him around the middle!! Up close..!! I realized he wasn't mah grandpa!! mega FML

#20420733
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15391) - you deserved it (26512)

On 12/25/2012 at 6:17am - misc - by Oops (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today , I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML

#20422121
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30217) - you deserved it (7829)

On 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by FuckMyEyes (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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