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Sunday 30 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after spending a lot of money on photo shoots to build up my portfolio, I finally got an offer from a modelling agency. I ran outside to tell my parents, only for my brother to hurl an iced snowball straight into my face. I now have a huge gash over my cheek and nose. FML

#20428566
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37462) - you deserved it (3924)

On 12/28/2012 at 8:23pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was at a party. Everyone was drunk, and I happened to overhear someone say, "Where's that guy in the black jacket? I'm going to beat his ass!" I wouldn't have thought anything of it, had I not been the only one wearing a black jacket. FML

#20433319
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24427) - you deserved it (2942)

On 12/31/2012 at 1:46am - misc - by bpruitt95 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was running on the treadmill at my local gym when I saw a girl I like a lot. I called out to her to say hi. As she was coming over, I accidentally stepped on the belt with one foot, crashed down on the treadmill, and continued to slide down in front of her, emerging with a gashed knee and arm. FML

#20445461
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21510) - you deserved it (3766)

On 01/06/2013 at 10:16pm - love - by Dkim620 (man) - United States

Today, I woke up to a small fire on my roof, burning up small twigs and branches. The cause? Last night, I threw a sparkling firecracker up very high, only to have it blown onto my roof by the wind. It's going to take $2,000 to fix the damage. FML

#20436289
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8395) - you deserved it (46678)

On 01/01/2013 at 1:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I learned that my doctor lost all of my immunization records. I can't start law school without them. FML

#20442687
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23145) - you deserved it (1465)

On 01/04/2013 at 3:51pm - health - by bureaucratic assfuckery (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, a stranger was kind enough to plow my driveway during a blizzard. However, they were not kind enough to leave their number after plowing the front end of my car. FML

#20431369
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27260) - you deserved it (2394)

On 12/30/2012 at 2:32am - misc - by imcold - United States

Today, my boyfriend showed up at my grandmother's wake in torn jeans and a Family Guy t-shirt. When I took him aside asked him what the hell he was thinking, he lost his temper and stormed out. FML

#20442809
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19774) - you deserved it (3725)

On 01/04/2013 at 5:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, during dinner, my mum asked why I've been so upset recently, so I just admitted it was because my girlfriend had cheated on me. At some point during my venting, I asked why this stuff always seems to happen to me. My dad looked up from his plate and said, "Probably karma." FML

#20442962
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16921) - you deserved it (5748)

On 01/04/2013 at 9:04pm - misc - by moronforadad (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my little sister asked me to open a jar of pickles for her. I struggled a little until the lid busted open, and pickle juice poured over my pocket and the iPhone inside. My sister then sniffed the jar, made a disgusted face, and ran out. FML

#20444015
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19324) - you deserved it (3308)

On 01/05/2013 at 7:06pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)



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