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Tuesday 11 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I announced to my coworkers that I'd "fixed the massive problem" they'd all been complaining about. Eleven different people made guesses at what the problem had been, ranging from how bad I smell to if I had learned to brush my teeth. I just meant that I'd fixed the coffee machine. FML

#20201213
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17098) - you deserved it (7362)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:50pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I accidentally left my textbook at home. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, but today was my class final. Since it was an open-book final, I'd decided not to study for it. I'm pretty sure I failed. FML

#20201964
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6460) - you deserved it (22646)

On 12/12/2012 at 2:14pm - misc - by dumbassgrad - United States (California)

Today, my "friends" set me up on a blind date with a guy who according to their description, sounded perfect in just about every way. He turned out to be my obsessive ex, and this is their idea of a funny prank. FML

#20402162
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28770) - you deserved it (2822)

On 12/16/2012 at 2:15pm - love - by lovelychris - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I went on a date. He stole my credit card. FML

Today, I saw a photo on Instagram of my friend flipping the camera the bird. She'd tagged it under "irony", so I jokingly suggested that she borrow a dictionary. She responded with a tirade of abuse, claimed to be sleeping with my boyfriend, and blocked me an hour later. FML

#20398380
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18693) - you deserved it (2746)

On 12/13/2012 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went on a cruise. I gave my bags to a porter, and tipped him $5. Later that night, my bags still hadn't arrived at my room, and that's when I realized that I'd paid a fake porter to steal my bags. FML

#20397361
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21781) - you deserved it (4543)

On 12/12/2012 at 10:43pm - misc - by McFizzy321 - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw a man in an army uniform. As a bit of a patriot, I went up to thank him for his service. After about 10 minutes of me going on and on, he started laughing. He wasn't a soldier. FML

#20405129
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14674) - you deserved it (24002)

On 12/18/2012 at 2:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while doing our Christmas shopping, my sister showed me a product that she really hated. The same one I bought her for Christmas. FML

#20403689
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22253) - you deserved it (2876)

On 12/17/2012 at 1:16pm - money - by bob (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I saw my daughter dusting her furniture with the white handkerchief I gave her as a wedding present. It's been in our family for 4 generations. FML

#20405217
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28275) - you deserved it (4775)

On 12/18/2012 at 5:03am - kids - by teejayrn -

Today, I'm insanely hungover from a long night of drinking. I'm going to my nephew's baptism in an hour as his godmother. FML

#20402048
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5673) - you deserved it (45147)

On 12/16/2012 at 12:26pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was pulled over and administered a sobriety test due to an officer's suspicion that I was driving under the influence. I was completely sober, and, apparently, I suck at driving. FML

#20401642
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13846) - you deserved it (7826)

On 12/16/2012 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took a relaxing bath, but got the book I was reading slightly wet when getting out. I put it on top of the towel dryer after delicately shaking it. Five minutes later, I heard a splash; I went into the bathroom to find that my book had toppled into the toilet bowl. FML

#20403223
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11109) - you deserved it (22943)

On 12/17/2012 at 2:33am - misc - by LemmyIsWet (man) - United States

Today, I sent an email to my boss saying I'd fixed a glitch in our mail servers. He called me later, angrily shouting that I'd done a piss-poor job of fixing it, because my email had spammed his inbox with several hundred duplicate messages. FML

#20399685
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15149) - you deserved it (9571)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:16pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Somerset)



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