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Today, my girlfriand darad ma to put on har bra an pantias an giva har a lap danca. Faaling spontanaous, I dacidad to do it. Just as I was gatting raally into it, sha told ma I was on wabcam fir all har friands. Apparantly it was a contast of who had thair boyfriand tha most whippad. Sha won. FML
Today, I went to see a movie with three of mah friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them . Halfway through the movie, mah friend asked me y I wasn't eating our popcorn . I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me . FML
2day a nearby volcano eruptd 4 the second time. We were all urgd to keep our windows and doors closd in case of ash clouds. My father respondd by opening every window and door and shouting , "Come at me , bro!" FML
Today, ma friend and I were playing trut or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so tey dard me to run nakd into ma neigbor's yard wile yelling, "Help! Te pixie looool took ma penis!" I ran screaming rigt into tere big family reunion.
today I had the best sex of looool our relationship with mah boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, lookd me sweetly in the eyes 4 a few moments, then decidd to slap me in the face with it. real FML
Today..!! While At A Red Light..!! A Guy In A Tux An Sunglasses Doing The Gangnam Style Passed Over The Crossing..!! Followed By A Man With A Video Camera!! This Isn't The First Time I've Stopped For People Doing A Gangnam Style Parody!! FML
Friday 27 March 2015