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December 2012

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TODAY, I RAN INTO MY INFANT DAUGHTER'S ROOM BECAUSE I THOUGHT I HEARD HER CRYING, AN FOUND SHE WAS STILL SOUND ASLEEP IN HER CRIB. THE SCREAMS WERE COMING FROM THE MOUSE OUR CAT WAS USING TO PAINT HER BEDROOM WALLS. FML

#20400604
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26620) - you deserved it (2021)

On 12/15/2012 at 10:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I spant naarly half an hour trying to dispal my sistar's baliaf that man hava to strap down thair panisas bafora going jogging. fat FML

#20402473
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29715) - you deserved it (3640)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Waterford)

Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down fir a chat over her recent cursing!! When my husband askedhere she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replid, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accusd me of cheating, and hasn't been home since!! FML

#20399736
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33718) - you deserved it (6144)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:52pm - love - by mandybar15 (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when he suddenly grabbed my front . He said, in a sexy voice, "Is that yur boob?" . He had grabbed a fat roll . FML

Today after my girlfriend has recently become obsessed with the serial-killer show Dexter she has grown an interest in cutting up pomegranates in many different ways and squirting the red blood-like juice everywhere!! I am now afraid to argue with her!! FML

#20400460
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26847) - you deserved it (2989)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:33am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

TODAY, MY CRAZY PSYCHOPATH OF A NEIGHBOR SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT, ( SO, ABOUT YUR SEX LIFE. ) I'VE BEEN SITTING ERE 4 20 MINUTES STARING AT IT BECAUSE I'M TOO SCARD TO OPEN IT. FML

#20189915
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34881) - you deserved it (3584)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by schooyou101 - United States (Kansas)

Today, mother-in-law, who apparently made a copy of our house key without permission, walked in on husband and me doing the deed. She went crazy, yelling at me for "defiling" her son. Last week, she yelled at me for not having given her grand-children yet. FML

#20405524
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56749) - you deserved it (3845)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by daughterinlaw (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today... the guy I'm dating found out I have severe arachnophobia. He downloadd a picture of a huge... hairy spider and set it as background on my iPhone. I can't even unlock my phone... as every time I try... the spider pops up and I drop the phone. He laughs every time I do it. FML

#20200411
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28534) - you deserved it (5782)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by skinnybitch (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

TODAY, MAH MOM HUNG HER NEW "CHRISTMAS CLOCK" ON THE WALL!! IT PLAYS A DIFFERENT CHRISTMAS CAROL EVERY HOUR, ON THE HOUR!! IT'S ONLY DECEMBER 2ND AND I'M ALREADY STARTING TO UNDERSTAND Y SUICIDE RATES SKY ROCKET THIS TIME OF YEAR!! FML

#20188746
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23331) - you deserved it (2360)

On 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

today mah son got suspendd from school . He's in kindergarten . fat FML

#20201910
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27092) - you deserved it (6715)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

Today I once again walked in looool on husband eating our cat's food. mega FML

#20409541
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34629) - you deserved it (4096)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by jsmills92 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

2day whila at tha airport waiting fir my flight, I sat down naxt to a mothar an har son. As I pulld out a watar bottla, sha laand ovar to har son an said, "Promisa ma u will navar do what tha looool man naxt to u just did." I hava no idaa what tha hall I did wrong. fat FML

Today.. . I asked mah grlfriend to marry me . She pretended not to hear me . FML

#20413271
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51509) - you deserved it (4647)

On 12/22/2012 at 7:50am - love - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



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