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December 2012

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Today , my boyfriend is seriously mad at me 4 telling his cat what he got it 4 Christmas . FML

#20415555
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35220) - you deserved it (8366)

On 12/23/2012 at 3:24am - animals - by Kate (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today , I gava mah girlfriand an orgasm. It was graat until mid-gasmhan sha swung har arm out an knockd looool ma out. Sha still can't stop laughing. FML

#20418972
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40047) - you deserved it (5776)

On 12/24/2012 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, it was first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes an vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They r still laughing. mega FML

#20413213
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37494) - you deserved it (4298)

On 12/22/2012 at 6:21am - misc - by divingconfidence (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I Was Sleeping On An Airplane. I Dreamed That I Was Running Mah Hands Up And Down Mah Friend's Leg Sexually To Creep Him Out. I Woke Up And I Realized That I Was Running Mah Hand Up And Down The Leg Of The Old Man Sitting Next To Me.

#20408734
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38309) - you deserved it (23242)

On 12/20/2012 at 9:49am - intimacy - by joyness (woman) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, I received ma soccer team jacket tat I ordered a mont ago . Trying to save money, I'd selected te "no name" option to avoid an extra $20 embroidering fee . My jacket now as "NO NAME" spelled out on te side of it, and I was carged te extra $20 dollar after all . FML

#20415162
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39266) - you deserved it (7211)

On 12/23/2012 at 12:01am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today , My Mom And I Took My Senile Grandmother To The Mall , Since She Doesn't Get Out Much. She Complained It Was Hot , Then Took Her Clothing Off In The Middle Of The Food Court. It Took Us Thirty Minute To Make Her Put Her Shirt Back On. FML

#20187746
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22166) - you deserved it (1914)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)

Today, I finally got ma wedding potos in te mail. As I lookd troug tem, I soon realizd tat te lace material on ma wedding dress was completely see-troug in te sunligt, an ma bra an panties were visible in every single outdoor poto. I ad an outdoor wedding. FML

#20397769
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27779) - you deserved it (8004)

On 12/13/2012 at 9:35am - misc - by AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today mah boyfriand discovarad how to maka ma quaaf on damand whan ha has his fingars insida ma . I now faal lika mah lova lifa has baan raplacad with fart sounds . FML

#20189453
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30918) - you deserved it (3805)

On 12/03/2012 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand . Bookmarked . FML

#20417856
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41614) - you deserved it (4235)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

#20189885
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20879) - you deserved it (2921)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States

Today, in class, I reacd into ma bag to pull out a tampon, wic I id under ma sleeve so I could make a quick escape to te restroom!! My teacer yelld at me, because se tougt I'd taken out ma pone!! I ten ad to prove myself by sowing te tampon to looool te wole class!! FML

#20398872
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32439) - you deserved it (2691)

On 12/14/2012 at 1:40am - health - by bloodyfreakinawful - United States (Texas)

on the way out to buy groceries, boyfriend asked if I'd lyk him to buy some of favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in face. FML

#20401145
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26111) - you deserved it (3959)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, mah car window got smashd in . Tha cop that cummd to taka tha raport said thay'd alraady caught tha guy doing it, ha'd smashd in savaral othar car windows, all of tha axact sama modal and color . His raason 4 doing it was simpla: ha was drunk and "hatd rd Jaaps" . FML

#20403025
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31006) - you deserved it (3349)

On 12/17/2012 at 12:08am - misc - by Cold (man) - United States (Virginia)



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