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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML

#20180075
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27237) - you deserved it (2535)

On 11/26/2012 at 6:11pm - misc - by ronboy - United States (Ohio)

Today, my friends and I held an intervention for my fiancé. He's been talking and behaving like an "old-timey cowboy" non-stop for the last three months. Our wedding is in a month and he refuses to marry me if I can't accept his "life choices." FML

#20149952
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19922) - you deserved it (3181)

On 11/06/2012 at 12:42am - love - by cowgirl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, someone posted photos from a party I was at. On each photo I'm posing in with a girl, my hand is not touching her, but is hovering over her like some creepy weirdo loser. My Facebook nickname is now of course "Hover Hand." FML

#20171594
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7989) - you deserved it (20638)

On 11/20/2012 at 9:37pm - misc - by Hover Hand (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after being single for a while now, I unwillingly went on a blind date with a guy my friend convinced me would be perfect for me. He took me to McDonald's; his father was with him the whole entire time. He is 27. FML

#20180462
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25523) - you deserved it (1960)

On 11/26/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by N - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I was mugged at gunpoint by a senior citizen. She now has a lousy $20, and I probably have PTSD. FML

#20182765
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18533) - you deserved it (2175)

On 11/28/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by stillshakinggd (man) - United States

Today, my dad went through all the trouble of sneaking onto my laptop and photoshopping a bong into my Facebook profile picture, apparently just so he could win a €20 bet with my mom, that hinged on her grounding me by December. FML

#20178213
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21796) - you deserved it (1535)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, after a week of looking for my car keys and being forced to drag my family around on public transportation, my wife found the keys in our car's ignition. FML

#20142914
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6309) - you deserved it (27352)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I started at my first job. Within the first five minutes of arriving, I was followed around by a white guy who repeatedly sang to me, "Black people love making music" along with a few of his own songs. It resulted in me getting fired for bringing my "boyfriend" to work. I didn't even know him. FML

#20163535
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21837) - you deserved it (1618)

On 11/14/2012 at 8:04pm - work - by sarahijklmnop (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I paid a surprise visit to my parents, after having moved out for university last year. My room had been stripped bare and all the family photos featuring me were missing from the wall. When I asked why, my mom asked me in return why I was asking stupid questions. FML

#20156480
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23213) - you deserved it (2020)

On 11/09/2012 at 5:03pm - kids - by jan420 (man) - Norway (Ostfold)

Today, I realized why it's a bad idea to store your business cards and your "emergency condom" in the same handbag compartment. I realized this after a client watched me miss the cards and pull out the condom after our lunch meeting. FML

#20144136
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7204) - you deserved it (26343)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:35am - work - by Hornymuch (woman) - Germany

Today, I was walking home, when I realized I didn't have my phone on me. After retracing my steps, I realized that I'd been listening to music from my phone the entire time. FML

#20177683
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7714) - you deserved it (28272)

On 11/25/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by Jocelyn - Canada (Alberta)

Today, despite my pleading, my boyfriend mounted a set of bullhorns above our headboard. Guess what came crashing down on our heads at 2am. FML

#20153273
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22999) - you deserved it (2273)

On 11/07/2012 at 10:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after finally falling asleep, my boyfriend woke me up and got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, and I'm lying in bed wide awake. FML

#20158574
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23934) - you deserved it (2827)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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