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Saturday 30 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my washing machine broke down, within its warranty. I asked my neighbour if she could open the door for the mechanic while I was at work; she agreed. When I came home, I had a bill for 80 bucks for not opening the door. Her reason? She was busy watching her favorite TV show. FML

#20573502
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31966) - you deserved it (4584)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:40pm - money - by Jack -

Today, I carried flat-packed boxes home from work to move my things into a new apartment. Whilst walking down the street, the wind kept blowing and spinning me round. A crowd eventually gathered, mistaking me for a street performer. Nobody helped or even threw me any loose change. FML

#20575849
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28326) - you deserved it (3312)

On 04/05/2013 at 7:04am - misc - by Gem - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, it was my friend's birthday, so I baked him a cake complete with his name written on it in homemade frosting. After I gave it to him, his mother berated me for it, saying I should have checked with her first before making a cake for her son. He's 28. FML

#20574002
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32272) - you deserved it (2361)

On 04/03/2013 at 10:51pm - misc - by JaneDoe (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I nervously started a new job, and my co-workers were telling me silly rules about our boss. Later, I accidentally bumped into him, and blurted "Rule #7, don't touch George." He definitely heard. FML

#20564827
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15715) - you deserved it (31290)

On 03/29/2013 at 12:38am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to get my car fixed. There was a vending machine in the waiting room, and I was hungry. The snacks were overpriced, but I still had a little money left over. I noticed a bag of Cheetos hanging loose, so I paid for them, hoping to get two bags. They both got stuck. FML

#20576079
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35103) - you deserved it (9061)

On 04/05/2013 at 12:34pm - money - by Z'ev - United States (New York)

Today, during a sex ed lesson, we were given a lecture on pregnancy and abortion from the school nurse. Throughout the session she kept repeating, "Of course, Sophie knows ALL about this." The nurse happens to know that my dad's a gynaecologist. That's not what everyone else in the year thinks. FML

#20559804
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41490) - you deserved it (2469)

On 03/25/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Soph (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my cat learned the hard way what the bathtub is for. While I was in it. FML

#20560819
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31010) - you deserved it (3540)

On 03/26/2013 at 10:22am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was approached by a What Not to Wear kind of show, where you get money to buy a new wardrobe. I was so excited that I fainted. They revoked the offer, reasoning that someone who faints so easily would be too much of a liability risk. FML

#20573162
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33988) - you deserved it (9887)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:57pm - misc - by SoClose (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband told me to look for a honeymoon resort, since we had to cancel it last year. I looked everything up and got all excited. Just when I asked him for payment information, he said "April Fools!" April Fools was two days ago. FML

#20573157
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36034) - you deserved it (3028)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:50pm - love - by letdown13 - United States (New York)

Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm from eagerly scratching off a lottery ticket. No, I didn't win anything. FML

#20576976
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24947) - you deserved it (15198)

On 04/06/2013 at 12:59am - health - by Kotoko (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, at work while near a cigarette tray outside, a man said, "Thanks for polluting our environment!" All I could say was, "What?" He then said "I'm speaking English you know!" I was cleaning the cigarette tray at the time, don't smoke at all, and was born here. FML

#20564434
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31485) - you deserved it (2349)

On 03/28/2013 at 8:57pm - work - by TVKill3r (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to whimsically serenade me by throwing rocks at my apartment window and singing. He got the wrong window. Another guy answered, and now he thinks I'm cheating on him. FML

#20559286
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36592) - you deserved it (2910)

On 03/25/2013 at 10:48am - love - by Faaccckkk (woman) - United States

Today, I showed my aunt and mother my tattoo. They both burst out laughing. FML

#20562807
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13087) - you deserved it (31071)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by anon - Netherlands (Limburg)



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