Sunday 3 March 2013 
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Today, a classmate posted a recording of a recent lecture on my university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some girl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27904) - you deserved it (2695)
On 02/27/2013 at 3:52pm - misc - by DumbCuntApparently (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, while mopping floors at the police station, an inmate pissed on the floor, demanded that I suck his dick, begged me for a glass of water and finally informed me that he would kill my family. I said nothing and he started weeping softly. I laughed, but slipped in his piss and broke my arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31048) - you deserved it (8737)
On 03/03/2013 at 5:21pm - work - by JimmyT (man) - Norway (Hordaland)
Today, my coach held a BBQ for the whole team. He told us to eat up, because we wouldn't be working out today. He lied. After eating the equivalent of a Thanksgiving dinner, we had to do team relays. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27917) - you deserved it (2946)
On 03/04/2013 at 5:24pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went to the store for a warranty claim on my prescription glasses due to little spots that had appeared on the lenses, covering both. It took 2 seconds for the employee to determine that it was hairspray. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5272) - you deserved it (27436)
On 03/07/2013 at 6:51am - misc - by jmrz - Puerto Rico
Today, a man I once worked with passed away. He was a lovely, caring, and inspirational person whom I looked up to. My husband's form of consolation? "Old people die. Get over it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25839) - you deserved it (2591)
On 03/10/2013 at 10:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I filled out an application for a job at Dairy Queen. I handed my application to the manager along with my résumé, and he said he'd be in contact with me. Not even five minutes after I left, a friend who works there sent me a picture of my crumpled-up application in the trash. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27301) - you deserved it (1551)
On 03/01/2013 at 10:52am - work - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)
Today, due to plumbing issues, I had to choose between a goosebump-inducing cold or skin-blistering hot shower. This is the 7th day in a row. My husband says it shouldn't be more than another week before he "gets it figured out". FML
I agree, your life sucks (21041) - you deserved it (1889)
On 03/03/2013 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I walked into what I thought would be a surprise birthday party. It wasn't. It was my parents staging an intervention over my cat obsession. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13639) - you deserved it (22878)
On 03/04/2013 at 3:02pm - misc - by DM - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I had to help my little sister do a first-grade project for school. For one part, they have to draw a picture of their role model. She drew a whale, and I asked, "A whale is your role model?" She laughed and said, "No! It's you!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29401) - you deserved it (3743)
On 03/05/2013 at 3:19pm - kids - by peace out - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I finally made a Facebook account after being home-schooled my entire life. I friended people that I know and their friends, and subsequently sparked a debate on whether or not I exist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21897) - you deserved it (2539)
On 02/27/2013 at 12:03am - misc - by thepokemonkid - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was told by co-workers with whom I have worked for 2 years that I tan too much and dye my hair black too often. I'm from the Middle East and have never tanned nor dyed my hair. My co-workers think I'm a wannabe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29512) - you deserved it (1651)
On 03/03/2013 at 4:29am - misc - by wannadi (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24846) - you deserved it (7395)
On 03/03/2013 at 1:03pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Bayern)
Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27503) - you deserved it (5233)
On 03/04/2013 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)
Friday 24 May 2013
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