Thursday 21 February 2013 
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Today, I walked outside to this guy attempting to steal my bike. When I asked him what he was doing he calmly replied, "I'm a bike inspector. You hooked your chain all wrong! This time is a warning; next time it'll be a ticket!" He then threw his full, opened Pepsi can at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22914) - you deserved it (1912)
On 02/27/2013 at 5:39pm - misc - by Chelsea - United States (Ohio)
Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20529) - you deserved it (2154)
On 02/19/2013 at 6:07pm - love - by Forever alone Guy - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I went sledding with my friends. I said I was tired and didn't want to go, but they press-ganged me into it. I ended up sledding right into a tree, fracturing my leg, and scraping up my entire face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20732) - you deserved it (4180)
On 02/24/2013 at 12:36pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, while I was studying for an exam, my younger sister came home extremely drunk and threw up all over herself and her bed. I later got grounded for not setting a better example. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26289) - you deserved it (1424)
On 02/28/2013 at 6:02am - misc - by catdog552 - United States
Today, I discovered that when you suddenly get channels that you didn't have before, it doesn't mean there was a glitch and you're getting free TV, it just means that your son called the cable company and had your plan changed so you get every conceivable channel at a hugely increased price. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25776) - you deserved it (3245)
On 02/20/2013 at 5:55pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I fell down a flight of stairs at college. I was taken to hospital with a fractured ankle and had to call my parents to drive me home. They constantly made passive-aggressive remarks on the way home, because I'd "totally ruined" their plans to eat out at a fancy restaurant tonight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22234) - you deserved it (2264)
On 02/28/2013 at 5:33pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Ards)
Today, I realized that the only positive accomplishment my boyfriend has made in the last 3 years is that he started wearing deodorant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18798) - you deserved it (5165)
On 02/27/2013 at 10:28pm - love - by butterflyzag20 - United States
Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25635) - you deserved it (1369)
On 02/21/2013 at 1:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, a colleague gave me an expensive box of chocolates for my birthday. I was surprised she spent so much on me, but didn't think much of it. Only when I got back home and excitedly opened the box did I realise the chocolates had expired months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21191) - you deserved it (1828)
On 02/23/2013 at 8:42pm - work - by Migole (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, during a silent breathing meditation at the Buddhist center, I accidentally let one rip which echoed through the meditation chamber. If that wasn't bad enough, the follow-up odor was enough to fell a charging rhinoceros. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19597) - you deserved it (5171)
On 02/22/2013 at 2:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my high-strung and normally very proper mother took twice her prescribed dose of Ambien, and extolled the virtues of a "full blown sexual relationship with oneself", advising my teenage sister to "only include the men when they behave." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22041) - you deserved it (1733)
On 02/18/2013 at 3:24am - intimacy - by buxton1 - United States (California)
Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML
I agree, your life sucks (27548) - you deserved it (3118)
On 02/20/2013 at 7:01am - kids - by Laila - United States
Today, I heard a commercial for a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, and transportation services if you cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad my perfect place is a senior center. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18649) - you deserved it (5849)
On 02/20/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by kryan012 - United States (Georgia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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