Tuesday 19 February 2013 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I locked my keys in my truck. The good news is that I have a spare set in my house. The bad news is that my house key is on the same keyring as my locked-in truck key. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20387) - you deserved it (6615)
On 02/25/2013 at 5:30pm - misc - by burning balls of fuck this - United States (Virginia)
Today, while at the nail salon, my boyfriend called. Since I was getting my nails done, I had to put him on speaker. The whole salon heard him break up with me. I can still hear their snickering in my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26182) - you deserved it (5149)
On 02/25/2013 at 6:04pm - love - by HeatherRosure18 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27496) - you deserved it (6846)
On 02/21/2013 at 3:46am - intimacy - by pornhastaughtmenothing - United States (Washington)
Today, I came home to find that while my husband and children were mindlessly watching TV, one of our dogs got into the cupboard that stores the deep fryer. He got the lid off, ate all of the old oil and barfed everything up on the couch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21899) - you deserved it (2788)
On 02/25/2013 at 2:25am - animals - by Sammy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was at my friend's house, when she commented that her dog's fur kept getting tangled because of its length. I reached over to tickle his tummy, felt a big tangled knot and agreed that he needed a good grooming. Then I realized what I'd grabbed wasn't fur. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20122) - you deserved it (6447)
On 02/26/2013 at 1:09pm - animals - by Puppylove (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I purchased a box of girl scout cookies from a coworker. I wanted to save them for later at home, so I placed them on my desk and then headed to a meeting. When I returned, there was an empty box sitting there with a post-it note saying, "Thanks!" Nobody will own up to it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20260) - you deserved it (4060)
On 02/18/2013 at 8:49pm - work - by erockinthesuburb (man) - United States
Today, I uploaded a new Facebook profile photo, which got over 20 likes in the space of an hour. The most I've ever gotten before was 10. Surprised, I went to check my picture again, only to notice two guys were sarcastically flipping me the bird in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22017) - you deserved it (5597)
Today, my son broke his hand when he and his best friend had the genius idea of punching each other in the fists as hard as they could. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21145) - you deserved it (2226)
On 02/24/2013 at 9:57pm - kids - by why the fuck would you do that - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was so exhausted that I slept through my phone ringing, and later my doorbell ringing. My psycho mom freaked out, and thinking I was in trouble, broke a window to get inside. This all happened before 7am. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27084) - you deserved it (2034)
On 02/20/2013 at 3:33pm - misc - by annoyed - United States (Arizona)
Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20536) - you deserved it (2154)
On 02/19/2013 at 6:07pm - love - by Forever alone Guy - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I went sledding with my friends. I said I was tired and didn't want to go, but they press-ganged me into it. I ended up sledding right into a tree, fracturing my leg, and scraping up my entire face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20735) - you deserved it (4180)
On 02/24/2013 at 12:36pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I heard a commercial for a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, and transportation services if you cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad my perfect place is a senior center. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18650) - you deserved it (5849)
On 02/20/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by kryan012 - United States (Georgia)
Today, I discovered that when you suddenly get channels that you didn't have before, it doesn't mean there was a glitch and you're getting free TV, it just means that your son called the cable company and had your plan changed so you get every conceivable channel at a hugely increased price. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25780) - you deserved it (3245)
On 02/20/2013 at 5:55pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
