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Monday 18 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while driving extremely fast on a road in the middle of nowhere, I started to go down a hill. Noticing a police car at the bottom, I slammed my brakes and blew a tire in the process. It turns out the police car was an old cutout used to trick people. FML

#20520975
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9076) - you deserved it (46479)

On 02/24/2013 at 10:41pm - misc - by Fox - United States

Today, I got my results on a recent, important midterm. During the exam, I'd noticed my instructor had accidentally left an answers page in the test packet, so being honest, I didn't look at them. It turns out she did it on purpose to help us pass. I failed. FML

#20515105
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32118) - you deserved it (13217)

On 02/20/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by its ok to cheat!? - United States (California)

Today, I emailed 10 parents inviting them to my son's birthday party. All 10 emailed back saying their kids had to get a cavity filled. FML

#20517380
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31597) - you deserved it (3292)

On 02/22/2013 at 9:51am - kids - by Paris101 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I felt like letting my ex know just how I felt about all the bullshit he put me through. I dug up his number, typed a long paragraph with lots of pain and emotion, and sent it. The reply: "No wonder he broke up with you." Thanks, whoever has that number now. FML

#20512366
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9040) - you deserved it (30120)

On 02/18/2013 at 4:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was pushing my wheelchair-bound grandpa back home, when a pretty girl walked past us in the opposite direction. He made me stop and turn him around, just so he could ogle her ass as she walked away. FML

#20518187
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25084) - you deserved it (4269) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/22/2013 at 9:27pm - misc - by hé merde - Sent from mobile version

Today, I came home from a rough day working two jobs to find a plate of cookies on my desk with a note from my roommates saying, "You deserve it!" I happily broke one in half to eat and discovered they contained coconut. I'm allergic to coconut, a fact both of my roommates are aware of. FML

#20521168
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29914) - you deserved it (3175)

On 02/25/2013 at 12:44am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was hanging out with the guy I really like. I lifted my arms to put my hair in a ponytail when he noticed a hole that had apparently tore in the armpit of my shirt, so he put his finger through it. I haven't shaved in weeks. FML

#20513075
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16544) - you deserved it (49125)

On 02/19/2013 at 1:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML

#20511747
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43643) - you deserved it (4874)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:09am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, the people living below me have been blasting their music so loudly that I can hear every word as clear as day. The people next door think it's my music and feel the need to bang on the wall and blast their music just as loudly in revenge. I have two very important exams tomorrow. FML

#20515010
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31917) - you deserved it (2776)

On 02/20/2013 at 3:40pm - misc - by Ughh! - France

Today, my boyfriend of three years told me he was thinking about us taking a break. After an hour of crying and him saying it would be okay, I accepted it. When I asked when the break would start, he replied, "What are you talking about? I only said I'd thought about it" and then laughed. FML

#20521204
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32493) - you deserved it (6160)

On 02/25/2013 at 1:10am - love - by Gullible (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while I was in the shower, my boyfriend decided to join me. We were really getting into it and he attempted to lift me up. Not only did I let out a massive fart, he slipped and fell on top of me. He won't stop laughing. FML

#20513159
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40247) - you deserved it (8915)

On 02/19/2013 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, as my lame excuse to not give a guy I met at a club my phone number, I told him I didn't have a cell phone. Guess what I checked when he asked me what time it was a few minutes later. FML

#20512812
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6024) - you deserved it (35800)

On 02/18/2013 at 10:21pm - misc - by hhhhhhhpeterwut - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she could not stand the thought of being in a relationship with a man who wears orange. This is the first time I've worn an orange shirt in at least 6 months. FML

#20521313
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26640) - you deserved it (2127)

On 02/25/2013 at 3:33am - love - by vat (man) - Hong Kong



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