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Tuesday 5 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had my girlfriend over for dinner with my family. My father had dressed up as a girl for a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and my girlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. FML

#20503190
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25317) - you deserved it (2939)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:55am - love - by BadLuckCarson - United States (Iowa)

Today, I checked out a "confessions" page for my university. The first confession was from a guy who whacked off in a campus restroom then used a computer in a lab without washing his hands. I work in that lab. FML

#20501884
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32907) - you deserved it (2748)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to do my laundry. Having no laundry bag, I put clothes in a suitcase and headed to the basement. When my roommate saw me, she burst into tears with happiness. FML

#20496887
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25405) - you deserved it (4918)

On 02/07/2013 at 9:45am - misc - by BonGoWash - United States (New York)

Today, a cute girl asked if my dog was available for a date on Valentine's Day. Thinking I was in luck, I asked if I should come along. She said no. My dog has better game than I do. FML

#20503854
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (568) - you deserved it (2135)

On 02/12/2013 at 4:50pm - animals - by Doggotmytongue - United States (Illinois)

Today, my roommate found an eviction notice on our door for unpaid rent. Our apartment building caught fire and we haven't been living there for well over a month because it was legally unlivable. Today was our first day back. FML

#20500469
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26140) - you deserved it (1521)

On 02/10/2013 at 1:08am - money - by fireenginemad - United States (Washington)

Today, I was walking to my dorm room while it was snowing heavily. I saw a girl in a wheelchair trying to get up a slippery incline. Being a good person, I asked to help. I'm a pretty weak guy, and I couldn't push her up. She wheeled away crying because she thought she was fat. FML

#20504485
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34045) - you deserved it (5273)

On 02/12/2013 at 11:57pm - misc - by IMadeAHandicappedPersonCry - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, after three weeks of holding out, my stingy boss finally called animal control about the birds in the air vent above the register. While I was working, they rummaged through the vents, causing live maggots to fall down right in front of me. FML

#20497093
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23758) - you deserved it (1649)

On 02/07/2013 at 2:44pm - animals - by shaviTuT (woman) - Malaysia (Johor)

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow. He's 22. FML

#20494713
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20576) - you deserved it (7789)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home from a two-week vacation. When I walked into my house, I found cat poop everywhere. It took me several hours to clean it all up, and the house still smells terrible. The worst part is that I've never owned a cat in my life. FML

#20500118
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30976) - you deserved it (1869)

On 02/09/2013 at 8:39pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was rehearsing for a school play. My drama teacher keeps criticising the part where I fake-trip, saying I make it look terribly fake. During today's rehearsal, I actually tripped for real, and smashed my kneecaps against the floor with a scream. He still said my "acting" sucked. FML

#20498655
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27475) - you deserved it (2336)

On 02/08/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my co-worker told me that I need to quit smoking because it was making me look and smell horrible. I've never smoked in my life. FML

#20493545
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22948) - you deserved it (2447)

On 02/04/2013 at 7:42pm - health - by Mattrd - United States

Today, a tenant in my apartment block told me about a nice shady place behind our building where he often goes to relax. Curious, I went looking for it. It was a quiet and secluded courtyard. At least until a man came out of nowhere waving a hammer in my face, screaming in a foreign language. FML

#20495981
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19388) - you deserved it (2440)

On 02/06/2013 at 6:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was partnered up with a girl in my art class, since the teacher had asked us to take turns drawing portraits of each other. I went first and felt pretty proud of how the drawing turned out. I showed it to her and she said "That's OK. I'm not good at drawing either." FML

#20494244
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23263) - you deserved it (2500)

On 02/05/2013 at 8:09am - work - by picasso - United States



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