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Friday 1 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow. He's 22. FML

#20494713
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21583) - you deserved it (8011)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my pants ripped while I was at work. I had to keep my balls to the wall while I dodged customers and edged ever closer to the break room. Before I could call my wife and ask her to bring a new pair, my boss burst in, got pissed, and made me go back out and deal with irate customers. FML

#20487736
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24336) - you deserved it (1975)

On 01/31/2013 at 3:27pm - work - by fuckit (man) - Italy (Lazio)

Today, I woke up to a voice-mail from my manager saying I had the day off. Excited, I made plans with my friends. A few minutes ago I got a call from my other manager yelling at me for not showing up, and the original manager revealed he had me confused with another girl. FML

#20491470
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27184) - you deserved it (1679)

On 02/03/2013 at 11:22am - work - by TheBaconater - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was rehearsing for a school play. My drama teacher keeps criticising the part where I fake-trip, saying I make it look terribly fake. During today's rehearsal, I actually tripped for real, and smashed my kneecaps against the floor with a scream. He still said my "acting" sucked. FML

#20498655
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28816) - you deserved it (2459)

On 02/08/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I spent most of my daughter's 8th birthday with her in the hospital while her broken arm was put in a cast. Apparently, my son had told her that some people gained the ability to fly on their 8th birthday before encouraging her to find out by jumping off the slippery slide. FML

#20486554
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23125) - you deserved it (1970)

On 01/30/2013 at 5:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my co-worker told me that I need to quit smoking because it was making me look and smell horrible. I've never smoked in my life. FML

#20493545
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27305) - you deserved it (3395)

On 02/04/2013 at 7:42pm - health - by Mattrd - United States

Today, a tenant in my apartment block told me about a nice shady place behind our building where he often goes to relax. Curious, I went looking for it. It was a quiet and secluded courtyard. At least until a man came out of nowhere waving a hammer in my face, screaming in a foreign language. FML

#20495981
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22491) - you deserved it (2759)

On 02/06/2013 at 6:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend came over for a family brunch, during which he told my mother, in vivid detail, how he gets the shits whenever he eats kale chips. FML

#20483441
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19829) - you deserved it (2463)

On 01/28/2013 at 6:02pm - health - by shitty situation - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was partnered up with a girl in my art class, since the teacher had asked us to take turns drawing portraits of each other. I went first and felt pretty proud of how the drawing turned out. I showed it to her and she said "That's OK. I'm not good at drawing either." FML

#20494244
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23365) - you deserved it (2504)

On 02/05/2013 at 8:09am - work - by picasso - United States

Today, I have been waiting for a call from a job I applied for. I soon got a text from my current boss, who doesn't know I'm job hunting, letting me know that the recruiter was trying to reach me. Turns out my number on my resumé was wrong. FML

#20483477
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7701) - you deserved it (33247)

On 01/28/2013 at 6:25pm - work - by faulty number - United States (Florida)

Today, I was washing the dishes at work. I had to pee really bad but first I wanted to finish the dishes. A coworker jumped out from behind the ice machine. I screamed like a girl and pissed my pants. FML

#20492292
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20271) - you deserved it (3637)

On 02/03/2013 at 10:50pm - work - by klovemachine (man) - United States

Today, I had an in-depth conversation at work about how technically Luke Skywalker was never a Jedi Master. Highlight of my working day. FML

#20497564
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17183) - you deserved it (4728)

On 02/07/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by djxerxes9000 - Canada



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