Friday 25 January 2013 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I was trying to sleep away a fever, when my grandma woke me up. She was sitting next to me, shoving gummy bears into my mouth until I started choking. She laughed, ran away, and denied everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27643) - you deserved it (2015)
On 01/30/2013 at 2:59pm - health - by cay - United States (New York)
Today, I was upset because my brother, who I'm very close to, didn't call me for my birthday yesterday. I told my mom about it, and we both immediately went silent on the phone, as we both realized she forgot to call me yesterday as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34313) - you deserved it (2279)
On 01/23/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by birthday_loser (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I met with my Bolivian friend, who's vacationing here for a few weeks. Eager to show him how welcoming we are in the USA, I took him home and introduced him to my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Bolivia? That's in Europe, right? We saved your asses in World War 2." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23375) - you deserved it (2557)
On 01/24/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by oh ffs (man) - United States
Today, I discovered that my downstairs neighbor is running a business out of her apartment. Or I should say, her pimp is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21773) - you deserved it (1383)
On 01/22/2013 at 8:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was driving my 9 month pregnant sister around in our golf cart and it died. I had to push it the rest of the way home. She wouldn't stop faking going into labor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23693) - you deserved it (3008)
On 01/25/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by really?!? - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my sister's boyfriend called while she was out. The second I answered he tried to have phone sex with me. When I explained to him that I wasn't my sister and that we just sound the same on the phone, he replied, "Don't care, let's keep going." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34118) - you deserved it (2324)
On 01/29/2013 at 4:40am - intimacy - by Awkward... (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20680) - you deserved it (2238)
On 01/28/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by Creeped out (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I saw a lady who had fainted. I ran over to help, only to find out that she was unstable and had a knife in her hand. She was pointing it at me, and growled threateningly every time I tried to move away. It took the cops an hour to defuse the situation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28601) - you deserved it (2051)
On 01/29/2013 at 4:48am - misc - by thegirlofthedad (woman) - India (Maharashtra)
Today, I was driving around with a few friends when one of them suggested we go in to an insurance company's office and sing their jingle. I'm an awful singer, so I was planning on lip syncing. Everyone else had the same idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9054) - you deserved it (28951)
On 01/31/2013 at 12:40am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I found out that I have a highly irrational fear of little people. I made this self discovery when my mother introduced the family to her new fiancé. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19504) - you deserved it (3435)
On 01/31/2013 at 4:07am - misc - by Why Me? (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while video chatting with my girlfriend, who lives on the other side of the country, I thought I'd play a song for her on my guitar. The string broke and hit me in the face. I burst into tears and had to hang up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26962) - you deserved it (5683)
On 01/21/2013 at 12:04pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mother burst into tears and hysterics when she found out my fiancée and I were not "pure" for our upcoming wedding. I'm 28, she's 27, and we've lived together for four years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24537) - you deserved it (2890)
On 01/22/2013 at 3:09am - love - by deflower (man) - United States (California)
Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24865) - you deserved it (3615)
On 01/22/2013 at 6:39am - kids - by dani0810 - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
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