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Wednesday 23 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, it's been two days since my upstairs neighbour's toilet started flooding both our apartments. I have to go to the bathroom with an umbrella. FML

#20471583
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30896) - you deserved it (2498) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/21/2013 at 3:24pm - misc - by normal - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I was waiting inside the shelter at the bus stop when a lady came up to me and asked if I would mind if she peed. FML

#20476019
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28795) - you deserved it (2165)

On 01/24/2013 at 2:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my dad and his new wife got their wedding pictures done. Out of over 150 pictures, I was only in one. The family dog was in all of them. In the one picture of me, I was holding the dog's leash while he took a dump. FML

#20486408
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37716) - you deserved it (2689)

On 01/30/2013 at 4:05pm - animals - by puppydrama - United States

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

#20480710
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32562) - you deserved it (3688)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out my ten year old brother and his best friend have taught our new parrot to say, "Shut up, bitch." We have a bunch of our extended family coming over tomorrow to see what the parrot can say. FML

#20473087
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27931) - you deserved it (3700)

On 01/22/2013 at 2:00pm - animals - by What? - Australia

Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML

#20477498
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29619) - you deserved it (5930)

On 01/25/2013 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom barged into my room at three in the morning, demanding to know where I'd been. I'd been in my room sleeping since ten o'clock. In that time she had called the police, all of my friends, and my ex-boyfriend, asking if I was with them. FML

#20479024
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36399) - you deserved it (2298)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Sarah - United States

Today, I went to buy a birthday present for my boyfriend. While buying him a sweater, the cashier tried to up-sale me by asking if my boyfriend wore briefs or boxers, because both were on sale. Not thinking, I blurted out, "I don't know, they just come off." FML

#20477493
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26990) - you deserved it (12740)

On 01/25/2013 at 12:31am - misc - by awkwardturtle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a cyclone hit my city. Though everywhere else is flooding, my house is fine. Well, that was until the toilet decided to overflow and regurgitate the entire town's sewerage. So now my only bathroom is covered in sewage, and I can't go anywhere else because of the flooding. FML

#20481750
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28214) - you deserved it (1965)

On 01/27/2013 at 6:47pm - health - by shitday - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I almost died. How? I nearly suffocated after passing out while chewing an entire pack of gum. I should really drink less. FML

#20484025
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8713) - you deserved it (43608)

On 01/28/2013 at 11:23pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I received a birthday present from a friend. It was the very same gift I gave to her for Christmas. FML

#20482991
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25445) - you deserved it (3915)

On 01/28/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by thrifty gone wrong - United States (California)

Today, my mother "checked in" to rehab on Facebook. The same rehab that told her to hand over her smartphone. The dumbass was smart enough to steal my phone and dumb enough to get it confiscated. FML

#20485491
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28179) - you deserved it (2597)

On 01/29/2013 at 10:18pm - health - by motherless - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was chatting with my choir leader. I told him that I have been thinking about taking singing lessons. His immediate reaction was, "Thank god, finally!" FML

#20474677
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26860) - you deserved it (6381)

On 01/23/2013 at 10:44am - misc - by sdd (woman) - Switzerland (Bern)



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