Sunday 20 January 2013 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, a four-year-old said a word that I didn't know the meaning of. I had to look up the definition. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12355) - you deserved it (28288)
On 01/17/2013 at 9:31pm - kids - by walkingdictionary - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got married. I'm Jewish, and it's traditional to break a glass cup by stepping on it after giving the bride her ring. My brother thought it would be funny to replace the glass cup with a rubber one. I slipped and fell flat on my back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27080) - you deserved it (2604)
On 01/25/2013 at 3:13pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29524) - you deserved it (2636)
On 01/14/2013 at 12:52am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24437) - you deserved it (1507)
On 01/16/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Kallian - United States
Today, while at the gym, my boyfriend wouldn't stop texting me. I was confident enough to text while on the treadmill. Bad idea: I hit myself on the bar and tripped in front of everyone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7703) - you deserved it (24573)
On 01/22/2013 at 1:50am - love - by Roxy19 - United States (California)
Today, I found out my ten year old brother and his best friend have taught our new parrot to say, "Shut up, bitch." We have a bunch of our extended family coming over tomorrow to see what the parrot can say. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20906) - you deserved it (2530)
Today, after getting into an argument with my dad, he told me that I would make a great ex wife one day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23051) - you deserved it (5007)
On 01/19/2013 at 8:51am - love - by Claire - United States (Maryland)
Today, I found out that my home-made pasta sauce had a weird taste to it because my basil patch in the backyard has become my dog's preferred spot to pee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25647) - you deserved it (4969)
On 01/19/2013 at 2:40am - animals - by damnthedog (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was waiting inside the shelter at the bus stop when a lady came up to me and asked if I would mind if she peed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21573) - you deserved it (1338)
On 01/24/2013 at 2:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, while sledding with my daughter, I tried getting her to go down a steeper slope than she's used to. She was worried she'd crash, so I went first to show her how it's done. I lost control halfway down the hill, bailed, and rolled into a tree. My wife has it on video. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18819) - you deserved it (9131)
On 01/19/2013 at 1:39pm - misc - by Fluffydemise - United States
Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24818) - you deserved it (478)
On 01/27/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, at 24, I still can't grow a single bit of facial hair. Well, at least not on the right side of my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21032) - you deserved it (1686)
On 01/27/2013 at 8:08pm - health - by ihatemylife - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was walking towards a party where I knew my cheating ex would be. I passionately rehearsed how I would have a go at him big time when I met him. Guess who was walking right behind me and heard it all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10325) - you deserved it (27487)
On 01/18/2013 at 7:55am - love - by Shuttie (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)
Monday 20 May 2013
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