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Saturday 19 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I discovered that my downstairs neighbor is running a business out of her apartment. Or I should say, her pimp is. FML

#20473717
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27127) - you deserved it (2175)

On 01/22/2013 at 8:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML

#20472782
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32005) - you deserved it (5135)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:39am - kids - by dani0810 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a bull escaped from the small farm down the street. It ended up in my yard and would not let me outside. I called animal control, who said, "We only deal with regular animals." FML

#20465397
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32749) - you deserved it (2162)

On 01/17/2013 at 10:48pm - animals - by bull-stuff - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I realised in the middle of my shift how useless my deodorant is in the stifling heatwave spreading through my country. It's no longer effective against my awful B.O., which is a problem because I'm a mascot, and my costume traps the smell inside like a portable toilet. FML

#20469816
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29997) - you deserved it (4655)

On 01/20/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I was babysitting, and a little girl asked for help with her homework. I cheerfully began an explanation, only to freeze mid-sentence. I could not for the life of me remember how to do long-division. I'm about to graduate from Cornell University, and her little brother had to correct me. FML

#20459773
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31555) - you deserved it (9565)

On 01/14/2013 at 9:52pm - kids - by IvyLeague? - United States (New York)

Today, I dragged my boyfriend to see Les Misérables with me. He now refuses to communicate with me through any medium other than singing. Apparently, this is his revenge. FML

#20471580
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16164) - you deserved it (46549)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:39pm - love - by lesson.learned (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I was driving my 9 month pregnant sister around in our golf cart and it died. I had to push it the rest of the way home. She wouldn't stop faking going into labor. FML

#20477938
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31394) - you deserved it (4053)

On 01/25/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by really?!? - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after working the midnight shift at my job, I thought it would be nice to leave a sweet love note along with my boyfriend's favourite candy in his car. Upon finding it, he immediately broke up with me for "breaking into" his car. FML

#20460414
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32450) - you deserved it (4942)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:14am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while video chatting with my girlfriend, who lives on the other side of the country, I thought I'd play a song for her on my guitar. The string broke and hit me in the face. I burst into tears and had to hang up. FML

#20471171
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32999) - you deserved it (7575)

On 01/21/2013 at 12:04pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I made my first snowman ever, and then cried when my big brother kicked it to pieces. I'm 27. FML

#20475358
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30786) - you deserved it (9479)

On 01/23/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my grandfather asked me why the broccoli I served for dinner was white. I told him it was cauliflower. He would't believe me, accused me of being a Russian spy, and stormed out. FML

#20461359
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31643) - you deserved it (2812)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by veggieluver (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, the lead singer of the band I recently joined blatantly admitted to a fan that the only reason he let me in was because I'm "so fuckin' ugly" that I make the rest of them look "ten times better" in comparison. FML

#20464662
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30731) - you deserved it (2633)

On 01/17/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by sad drummer (man) - United States (California)

Today, a four-year-old said a word that I didn't know the meaning of. I had to look up the definition. FML

#20465228
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15061) - you deserved it (32745)

On 01/17/2013 at 9:31pm - kids - by walkingdictionary - Canada (Ontario)



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