Saturday 19 January 2013 
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Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I asked him to make me some coffee too. When he brought me my drink, I took a sip, and realized he'd poured salt in it. As I gagged, he muttered, "Next time, make it yourself." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23603) - you deserved it (5486)
On 01/20/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by megean c.l. (woman) - United States
Today, it's been two days since my upstairs neighbour's toilet started flooding both our apartments. I have to go to the bathroom with an umbrella. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23710) - you deserved it (1576) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/21/2013 at 3:24pm - misc - by normal - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Today, I was suffering from an asthma attack, so I grabbed my inhaler and took a puff. This was probably very disturbing for the earwig which had somehow made my puffer its home, as I discovered when it shot into my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24384) - you deserved it (2017)
On 01/25/2013 at 1:30am - health - by asthmattack (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, a four-year-old said a word that I didn't know the meaning of. I had to look up the definition. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12355) - you deserved it (28289)
On 01/17/2013 at 9:31pm - kids - by walkingdictionary - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got married. I'm Jewish, and it's traditional to break a glass cup by stepping on it after giving the bride her ring. My brother thought it would be funny to replace the glass cup with a rubber one. I slipped and fell flat on my back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27082) - you deserved it (2605)
On 01/25/2013 at 3:13pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29533) - you deserved it (2637)
On 01/14/2013 at 12:52am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24440) - you deserved it (1507)
On 01/16/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Kallian - United States
Today, while at the gym, my boyfriend wouldn't stop texting me. I was confident enough to text while on the treadmill. Bad idea: I hit myself on the bar and tripped in front of everyone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7707) - you deserved it (24575)
On 01/22/2013 at 1:50am - love - by Roxy19 - United States (California)
Today, I found out my ten year old brother and his best friend have taught our new parrot to say, "Shut up, bitch." We have a bunch of our extended family coming over tomorrow to see what the parrot can say. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20908) - you deserved it (2530)
Today, after getting into an argument with my dad, he told me that I would make a great ex wife one day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23052) - you deserved it (5007)
On 01/19/2013 at 8:51am - love - by Claire - United States (Maryland)
Today, I found out that my home-made pasta sauce had a weird taste to it because my basil patch in the backyard has become my dog's preferred spot to pee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25646) - you deserved it (4968)
On 01/19/2013 at 2:40am - animals - by damnthedog (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was waiting inside the shelter at the bus stop when a lady came up to me and asked if I would mind if she peed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21573) - you deserved it (1338)
On 01/24/2013 at 2:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, while sledding with my daughter, I tried getting her to go down a steeper slope than she's used to. She was worried she'd crash, so I went first to show her how it's done. I lost control halfway down the hill, bailed, and rolled into a tree. My wife has it on video. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18821) - you deserved it (9131)
On 01/19/2013 at 1:39pm - misc - by Fluffydemise - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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