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Thursday 10 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today I got ome only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming te freezing streets calling is name I returned to fine im stuck beind te couc wit my cewed-up new soes in is muzzle. real FML

#20447616
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26464) - you deserved it (5844)

On 01/08/2013 at 5:40am - animals - by Coldandshoeless (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that my sleep-walking is so bad that I regularly text my friendhile I sleep . I have no idea how many times this has happened . mega FML

#20455938
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23741) - you deserved it (3062)

On 01/12/2013 at 8:30pm - health - by I'm screwed - Canada (Alberta)

Today, dad learnd that it's possible to power a lightbulb with a potato. Since then, he's been going around the house removing all the plugs from the wall and plugging them into potatoes instead. He's absolutely baffld as to y it won't work.

#20450090
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29030) - you deserved it (2474)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:23pm - misc - by Darkandcold - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, an intoxicated gentleman stumbled into mah shop requesting alcohol,hich I do not sell. When I informed him of this, he expressed his disappointment by urinating on the floor.

#20445898
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24405) - you deserved it (1980)

On 01/07/2013 at 6:11am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, mah boyfriend of a year askd me to move in with him. I would have been touchd at this gesture, had he not askd in the form of a text message, saying: "Got kickd out. Wanna get a flat or something?" FML

#20447722
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29710) - you deserved it (3569)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:31am - love - by movingbuddy (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, mah boyfriend broke up with me at mah grandma's funeral. FML

#20452848
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45281) - you deserved it (2622)

On 01/10/2013 at 11:06pm - love - by good job bf (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out 4 my boyfriend, telling him how much I love an adore him!! He answered by leaning in close, saying ( Jolly good ) in an affected accent, an burping loud an clear in my ear!! FML

#20455481
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27671) - you deserved it (4577)

On 01/12/2013 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, while making dinner I cut mah finger badly with a knife. When I yelled 4 mah dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste mah blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML

#20458321
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35471) - you deserved it (3098)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:52am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was walking mah dog when he decidd that he was too lazy to continue walking!! It endd looool up with me looking lyk a crazy dog lady carrying mah medium-sizd dog home!! FML

#20448490
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25839) - you deserved it (4627)

On 01/08/2013 at 6:56pm - animals - by life// (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

my mothar cummd back from har trip to Vagas. Har braast wara obviously 2 lattar sizas largar. I askd if sha got a boob job and sha danid it , saying that it's against har raligion. Sha's an athaist , and a liar. FML

#20460160
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35314) - you deserved it (3206)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by Brooke - United States (California)

Today, my mom made up a new game. She thinks it's hilarious to hide my brother's creepy Batman toy around the house to creep me out. This has been going on fir hours an I still scream every time. FML

#20454752
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24342) - you deserved it (9513)

On 01/12/2013 at 1:36am - misc - by poohanne - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I ad to explain to usband tat te 5-second looool rule doesn't apply if u drop te floss into te toilet. FML

#20458013
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34553) - you deserved it (2846)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:36pm - misc - by PeeFlavouredFloss (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret . He then added that his mother picked it out . FML

#20459473
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29850) - you deserved it (3111)

On 01/14/2013 at 7:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland)



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