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Sunday 30 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today... my 14-year-old daugter cummd ome after sneaking out and partying. Se was totally drunk... and startd crying on my soulder because some boy namd "Tomas" as a small dick... and se ad to fake an orgasm. fat FML

#20419819
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82307) - you deserved it (25296)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her she really was a girl and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34.

#20444863
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26646) - you deserved it (8047)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:24pm - love - by lifsabtch (man) -

Today, I woke up with an engagement ring on mah left hand. The same one I refused last month. My boyfriend apparently waited 4 me to be drunk to propose again last night, and has already posted the pics on Facebook. FML

#20427625
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38413) - you deserved it (14571)

On 12/28/2012 at 10:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was at a restaurant with mah boyfriend. He wound up drinking ahole bottle of wine, andhen the bill cummed he drunkenly yelled at the waiter, claiming it should be free, cuz he's in the military ( fighting 4 yur freedom ). He's a mechanic in the National Guard. mega FML

#20443881
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23808) - you deserved it (3850)

On 01/05/2013 at 4:56pm - love - by so embarrassed (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, girlfriend donatd most of book collection because she got me a Kindle fir Christmas. Some were signd, including Harry Potters. fat FML

#20427017
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55759) - you deserved it (3963)

On 12/27/2012 at 11:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

TODAY , I WAS DRIVING WITHOUT MY SEATBELT ON , WHEN I NOTICED A POLICE CAR APPROACHING. I PANICKED AND DESPERATELY FUMBLED AROUND FIR MY SEATBELT , ONLY FIR THEM TO PASS BY WITH JUST A FUNNY LOOK. THEN IT HIT ME THAT I WAS RIDING MY MOTORCYCLE. FML

#20428799
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22961) - you deserved it (45215) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by ELparano - Canada

TODAY, MY CAR WAS BROKEN INTO. WHAT WAS STOLEN? MY DAUGHTER'S $11 ONE DIRECTION POSTER. WHAT WILL IT COST TO FIX MY CAR? $1,000. REAL FML

#20427068
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37925) - you deserved it (3794)

On 12/27/2012 at 11:58pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today... mah boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny... and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid mah panting... I breathed the words... "Fuck me." He then stopped and said... "Excuse me... I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. mega FML

#20418295
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50726) - you deserved it (10606)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I have been looool for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with mother, she yelld, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

#20434659
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48078) - you deserved it (7205) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/31/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by aelia_oups - Sent from mobile version

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watchd as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposd to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissd him and shoutd, "Yes!" With us still highly confusd, she then ran away. FML

#20431269
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44562) - you deserved it (3459)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:29am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend of four yeres broke up with me by writing on my bathroom looool mirror in Sharpie. What did he write? "Hi, I'm Emily. I'm fat, ugly, and now single." FML

#20440103
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51594) - you deserved it (4559)

On 01/03/2013 at 1:42am - love - by Emily (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today hile buying paint I began to help an elderly woman working to lift some heavy boxes. She told mehat a nice young lady I was. Then her boss cummed over screamed at her fir being lazy and fred her. She cried. So did I. FML

#20433852
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45532) - you deserved it (2858)

On 12/31/2012 at 10:44am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)



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