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Thursday 20 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I came home to find my husband and our 4-year-old son simultaneously peeing off the second-floor balcony. My husband was giggling like a little girl. FML

#20403594
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34245) - you deserved it (6098)

On 12/17/2012 at 11:21am - kids - by Bonding_boys (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my fiancé called off our engagement after I contested his belief that women stop having periods after they are married. FML

#20404199
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36745) - you deserved it (4049)

On 12/17/2012 at 7:29pm - love - by kidyounot (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I gave my husband an early Christmas present: Santa-themed lingerie. He got angry and called me selfish, for "using" him as an excuse to get myself nice stuff. FML

#20418722
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41553) - you deserved it (13373)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:06pm - intimacy - by selfishsexysanta (woman) - United States

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32617) - you deserved it (7976)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He seemed excited, and said we should make the baby fat so he can bounce her on his lap and watch her double chin jiggle. Just to prove he's serious, he's been searching for high-calorie foods for babies. FML

#20405554
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40039) - you deserved it (6168)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:33pm - kids - by fatbabysyndrome (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I looked at my neighbor's empty lawn; he's an old guy and he usually has the best Christmas lights. We knew he might not be able to do them this year, so I felt bad and I did them for him. Later, a neighbor asked about them and I told her that I helped out. She said, "You do know he died, right?" FML

#20411217
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36565) - you deserved it (18057)

On 12/21/2012 at 11:00am - misc - by Syd - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at my job as a cashier when a man called me his "Grocery Slave." I was almost offended, but then I thought about my salary. I am a Grocery Slave. FML

Today, the highly intoxicated singer of my band decided it would be a wonderful idea to squat down and take a shit on stage in the middle of a gig. FML

#20408486
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40882) - you deserved it (4614)

On 12/20/2012 at 3:16am - misc - by dudeyouarefired -

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

#20409541
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36741) - you deserved it (4288)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by jsmills92 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

#20418714
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50039) - you deserved it (27222)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I had to break up with my boyfriend when I caught him installing cameras in my bathroom. FML

#20403401
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43596) - you deserved it (4571)

On 12/17/2012 at 7:25am - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML

#20414298
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53063) - you deserved it (6662)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by orgasmicriding (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I told my husband to tell me his wildest fantasy. He told me it was to put on fake antlers and "do it like deer". FML

#20415339
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39167) - you deserved it (8139)

On 12/23/2012 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Kasey Eames - United States (California)



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