Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Sunday 16 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, Bacausa My Boyfriand Drivas A 2-saatad Sports Car, I Had To Awkwardly Sit On His Brothar's Lap As Wa Drova To Tha Stora . I Soon Falt A Poking Sansation Through His Pants, Just A Faw Minutas Bafora Wa Hit A Bumpy Road . Maga FML

#20414298
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48899) - you deserved it (6186)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by orgasmicriding (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, mah friend was complaining to me about her problems. I tried to be a good, understanding friend, listening and giving advice. When it was mah turn to vent, she interrupted me, saying, "Sorry, but I don't really care." mega FML

#20201674
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29586) - you deserved it (2348)

On 12/12/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by sushichick (woman) - United States

Today, I had plans for a romantic night with mah boyfriand, who is parfact in avary way possibla. Wa wara going to hava sax for tha first tima as wall. Unfortunataly, I had a draam last night about him shitting all ovar ma an I can't look at him with a straight faca. maga FML

#20403258
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36963) - you deserved it (14236)

On 12/17/2012 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today , tha highly intoxicatd singar of mah band dacidd it would ba a wondarful idaa to squat down and taka a shit on staga in tha middla of a gig!! FML

#20408486
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37178) - you deserved it (4281)

On 12/20/2012 at 3:16am - misc - by dudeyouarefired -

Today , I looked at ma neigbor's empty lawn; e's an old guy and e usually as te best Cristmas ligts. We knew e migt be able to do tem tis year , so I felt bad and I did tem fir im. Later , a neigbor asked about tem and I told er tat I elped out. Se said , "You do know e died , rigt?" FML

#20411217
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32974) - you deserved it (17235)

On 12/21/2012 at 11:00am - misc - by Syd - United States (Texas)

Today, I told mah husband to tell me his wildest fantasy !! He told me it was to putted on fake antlers and "do it lyk deer" !! mega FML

#20415339
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36537) - you deserved it (7776)

On 12/23/2012 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Kasey Eames - United States (California)

Today, ma fiancé called off our engagement after I contested is belief tat women stop aving periods after tey are married. FML

#20404199
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33799) - you deserved it (3825)

On 12/17/2012 at 7:29pm - love - by kidyounot (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today , my friend an I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool , I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out an ran onto the deck , slipping an falling flat on my back. Her dad saw thehole thing. FML

#20407433
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13102) - you deserved it (32823)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, mah roommate pressed "snooze" on his alarm 14 times!! looool I counted!! FML

#20200321
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21226) - you deserved it (2186)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by roommateprobssss:( - United States

TODAY, I RAN INTO MY INFANT DAUGHTER'S ROOM BECAUSE I THOUGHT I HEARD HER CRYING, AN FOUND SHE WAS STILL SOUND ASLEEP IN HER CRIB. THE SCREAMS WERE COMING FROM THE MOUSE OUR CAT WAS USING TO PAINT HER BEDROOM WALLS. FML

#20400604
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26620) - you deserved it (2021)

On 12/15/2012 at 10:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Yesterday , mah dad forced thehole family to sit through a two-hour lecture , with supporting research , on how the ( Mayan prophecy ) is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he think we're all borderline brain-dead , gullible fuckwitho believed it to begin with. Thanks , dad. big fat FML

#20400784
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20879) - you deserved it (4325)

On 12/15/2012 at 1:43pm - misc - by oh gee, you don't say (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Taday ma best friend told me about a vicious rumor tat's going around, saying I contracted a orrible STD. I asked er if se told everyone it was a lie. Se said no, cuz te rumor is apparently ( way too funny to ruin. ) Maybe it's time fir new friends. mega FML

#20397919
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25787) - you deserved it (2163)

On 12/13/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Katie (woman) - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: