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Friday 7 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my doctor finally prescribed me some medication for my arthritis. The cap was insanely well-secured, and my hands were too racked with pain to get it off. FML

#20197805
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25797) - you deserved it (1470)

On 12/09/2012 at 3:03pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

#20194263
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24427) - you deserved it (1659)

On 12/06/2012 at 8:07pm - misc - by Matt8 (man) - United States

Today, while my mother was driving me to school, her coffee started to spill. So like a normal parent, she held it over my lap. FML

#20397679
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24959) - you deserved it (1874)

On 12/13/2012 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, as my friend was rudely rummaging through my phone, she saw a picture of the pottery I've painted her for Christmas. Not only did she see it, but she also declared it ugly. That's probably the present I'm the most proud of this Christmas. FML

#20193344
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21108) - you deserved it (1989)

On 12/06/2012 at 1:15am - misc - by a - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was getting intimate with my current bootycall when he thought it would be funny to make animal sounds. He "baa-ed" "moo-ed" and "gobbled" until losing his erection from intense laughter, leaving me there very confused and unsatisfied. FML

#20198007
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26041) - you deserved it (9185)

On 12/09/2012 at 5:46pm - intimacy - by Bug5992 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to create a perfect society in English class; the best society has their grade go up a full letter. After tons of preparation and thinking, I lost to an island made only of cheese. FML

#20200774
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20750) - you deserved it (1912)

On 12/11/2012 at 6:03pm - misc - by JPPUDLY (man) - United States (California)

Today, it's my sixth day taking care of my family's seven animals while my parents are in Singapore. So far, I've emergency-called the vet twice, taken a dog to the vet once, and cleaned up liquid dog shit five times. FML

#20197436
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21293) - you deserved it (2370)

On 12/09/2012 at 8:18am - animals - by KennyDidIt - United States (Alabama)

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

#20199452
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22335) - you deserved it (2307)

On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States

Today, I started a new job. I'm now trapped in a small office with a woman who says, "Oh my gravy!" constantly. In response to everything. FML

#20201125
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21177) - you deserved it (1812)

On 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, a lady on the bus came up to me and asked if she could sit down. Thinking she meant the seat next to me, I said sure. She meant my lap. FML

#20198778
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21222) - you deserved it (1812)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:13am - misc - by LLCK - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had the pleasure of finding out how it feels to poop with 3 broken ribs. FML

#20398877
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27810) - you deserved it (1807)

On 12/14/2012 at 1:44am - health - by mysidesaresplitting - United States (Michigan)

Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML

#20195821
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26880) - you deserved it (4743)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:33am - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, my crazy psychopath of a neighbor sent me an email with the subject, "So, about your sex life." I've been sitting here for 20 minutes staring at it because I'm too scared to open it. FML

#20189915
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32646) - you deserved it (3396)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by schooyou101 - United States (Kansas)



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