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Friday 7 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

#20198547
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23441) - you deserved it (5527)

On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)

Today, I realized the dress I bought yesterday still had the security tag on. I returned to the store to get it removed, only to realize my receipt was misplaced. The lady at the counter thought I stole it, called security, and had me escorted out, dress-less. FML

#20196308
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20868) - you deserved it (2614)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:12pm - money - by bitchsawmebuyit - United States (New York)

Today, I smiled at a new kid and started a conversation with him, just to be nice. He later sent me 24 messages describing how strong his love for me is. I'm scared to go to school tomorrow. FML

#20200101
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28006) - you deserved it (3105)

On 12/11/2012 at 3:39am - love - by you're just creepy. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML

#20199068
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27686) - you deserved it (10661)

On 12/10/2012 at 1:37pm - intimacy - by hnickell93 - United States (California)

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15275) - you deserved it (5568)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I went Christmas shopping for my cat. I still haven't bought presents for my family, yet my cat already has several small gifts under the tree and an outfit to wear around the house. I really need a new hobby. FML

#20397631
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7468) - you deserved it (23980)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:04am - animals - by catlover - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend got done with Marine combat training. The first thing he asked for weren't pictures of me but pictures of his car. Missed you too babe. FML

#20198694
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19227) - you deserved it (2545)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:47am - love - by chels (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

#20199342
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24241) - you deserved it (5891)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan)

Today, I overheard my parents fighting about who has been the most loyal. I found out my Dad has cheated twice, and is still the most faithful of the two. FML

#20198811
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25511) - you deserved it (1441)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:41am - love - by slenderman908 - United States (Michigan)

Today, in history class, we were talking about Ancient Rome, and what childbirth would have been like back then. One girl asked in all seriousness why they didn't use ultrasound machines to see what sex their babies were. I have to deal with people like this on a daily basis. FML

#20398310
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21192) - you deserved it (1121)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:44pm - misc - by surrounded by dumbfucks (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML

#20189453
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25152) - you deserved it (3204)

On 12/03/2012 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, it's my 21st birthday and my dad has decided to take away my ID in fear that if I have even one drink to celebrate I'll become a raging alcoholic. FML

#20189765
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18814) - you deserved it (2034)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by VedaLynn - United States

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

#20194684
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25491) - you deserved it (3982)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:46am - misc - by lingadoo - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)



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