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Saturday 1 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had just had a shower, when I noticed that the mix of my shower gel and deodorant smelled like Lynx Dark Temptation. I was happy, as this is my favourite men's deodorant, until I realised I was happily sniffing my own boobs because they smelled like my ex-boyfriend. FML

Today, I have three cracked ribs. I have also, for the first time in my life, developed a case of the hiccups that simply will NOT go away. It's been hours. FML

#20184990
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24801) - you deserved it (1389)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:30am - health - by Atletic - United States (New York)

Today, my 5 kids were singing their favorite Christmas carols in the van, each trying to sing louder than the others. It would have probably sounded better if they were all singing the same song. FML

#20183806
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20358) - you deserved it (3916)

On 11/29/2012 at 9:22am - kids - by Dave (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, it's my 21st birthday and my dad has decided to take away my ID in fear that if I have even one drink to celebrate I'll become a raging alcoholic. FML

#20189765
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20818) - you deserved it (2223)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by VedaLynn - United States

Today, my boss was telling everyone that he knew a guy who went to a college at which multiple people were shot and killed recently. Being extremely socially awkward and uncomfortable, I blurted, "That's awesome." Now everyone in the office is terrified of me. FML

#20191114
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10921) - you deserved it (21001)

On 12/04/2012 at 4:34pm - work - by Adan - United States (Washington)

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

#20194684
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26781) - you deserved it (4178)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:46am - misc - by lingadoo - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today, I've now worked on Thanksgiving, Black Friday, the weekend after that, and two days this week. My husband and son have had all that time off, and yet I've still ended up having to clean the dishes and the house after them on all of these days. FML

#20181186
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25448) - you deserved it (5057)

On 11/27/2012 at 1:05pm - work - by bored - United States

Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML

#20189453
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30799) - you deserved it (3798)

On 12/03/2012 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, someone very close to me came out of the closet. Normally I would fully support them, had we not just gotten married. FML

#20181869
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38609) - you deserved it (2421)

On 11/27/2012 at 10:08pm - love - by Bliggins - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

#20182568
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23225) - you deserved it (1959)

On 11/28/2012 at 12:43pm - health - by williebees - United States (Texas)

Today, I was mugged at gunpoint by a senior citizen. She now has a lousy $20, and I probably have PTSD. FML

#20182765
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18339) - you deserved it (2153)

On 11/28/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by stillshakinggd (man) - United States

Today, at school, I have to do a 45 minute presentation with a girl who has panic attacks so bad that she cries, runs out of the room, and sometimes passes out. This presentation terrifies her and it's a major part of my final grade. FML

#20192286
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22248) - you deserved it (2019)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by Murlocmurk - United States

Today, my boss called me Dave. Now everyone actually thinks my name is Dave. It's Nathan. I've been working there for 2 years. FML

#20181011
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23895) - you deserved it (2041)

On 11/27/2012 at 8:16am - work - by nato (man) - United States



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