Tuesday 27 November 2012 
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Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23976) - you deserved it (3151)
On 12/03/2012 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my husband discovered poking me in my belly button makes me have to pee, sometimes it's uncontrollable and happens immediately. He thinks it's hilarious and decided it's his new favorite game. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19323) - you deserved it (1737)
On 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my boss was telling everyone that he knew a guy who went to a college at which multiple people were shot and killed recently. Being extremely socially awkward and uncomfortable, I blurted, "That's awesome." Now everyone in the office is terrified of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8408) - you deserved it (13309)
On 12/04/2012 at 4:34pm - work - by Adan - United States (Washington)
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. After dessert, he went to the bathroom so I quickly called the waiter over and paid the bill, thinking it was a nice gesture. When he returned, he broke up with me for "emasculating" him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17607) - you deserved it (2771)
On 11/27/2012 at 6:36am - love - by Clementine (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my boss called me Dave. Now everyone actually thinks my name is Dave. It's Nathan. I've been working there for 2 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17670) - you deserved it (1338)
On 11/27/2012 at 8:16am - work - by nato (man) - United States
Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17393) - you deserved it (1287)
On 11/28/2012 at 12:43pm - health - by williebees - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17897) - you deserved it (3555)
On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States
Today my boyfriend and my best friend had a very lengthy, detailed conversation about Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit, of which I know nothing about. Once they stopped, I looked at him and smiled, and he responded with, "Why can't you be more like her?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20874) - you deserved it (5954)
On 11/28/2012 at 11:33pm - love - by JStein (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20380) - you deserved it (1952)
On 11/26/2012 at 6:11pm - misc - by ronboy - United States (Ohio)
Today, I ran across the street due to a line of cars waiting for me to cross. Just as I reached the other side, my iPhone slipped out of my hand and fell into the road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after the other. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16043) - you deserved it (5786)
On 11/27/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by unknown - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, after almost four years of having avoided her due to her hatred of my husband, my mother invited us both to a family dinner. My husband wanted to give her another chance, so we went. Less than an hour after arriving, I caught her hocking a loogie and spitting it into our food. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19592) - you deserved it (1044)
On 11/28/2012 at 6:04pm - love - by some things never change (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16616) - you deserved it (1149)
On 12/03/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by poopsthegame - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I caught the train into the city. Halfway there some kids hopped on smelling of marijuana and alcohol. Their topic of discussion? How much pubic hair they had. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14921) - you deserved it (2053)
On 11/29/2012 at 12:40am - kids - by fabs1171 - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 17 June 2013
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