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Saturday 24 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found out that the woman from My Strange Addiction who can't stop picking her scabs is married. I've been single for two years and I don't even pick my nose. FML

#20179069
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22490) - you deserved it (3382)

On 11/25/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by Sam (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I caught the train into the city. Halfway there some kids hopped on smelling of marijuana and alcohol. Their topic of discussion? How much pubic hair they had. FML

#20183521
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23976) - you deserved it (3177)

On 11/29/2012 at 12:40am - kids - by fabs1171 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was messing around with my wife. I grabbed her boobs and said, "Honk honk". Unbeknownst to me, my daughter saw it. Now my 3-year-old girl runs around honking everyone. Even her grandparents. FML

#20172916
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13079) - you deserved it (30349)

On 11/21/2012 at 8:20pm - kids - by piemasterzim (man) - Canada

Today, I fell off my boyfriend's motorcycle. I had a few scrapes and bruises, and my boyfriend called for an ambulance as a precaution. The paramedics managed to drop me on my head. FML

#20177257
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28998) - you deserved it (2035)

On 11/24/2012 at 9:35pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was working the dart game at my local amusement park when a couple paid to play. They were highly intoxicated, and they thought the object of the game was to hit me with the darts. FML

Today, I have three cracked ribs. I have also, for the first time in my life, developed a case of the hiccups that simply will NOT go away. It's been hours. FML

#20184990
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28233) - you deserved it (1636)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:30am - health - by Atletic - United States (New York)

Today, my mom found her CD of cats and dogs singing Christmas songs. That is what I'll be listening to until Christmas. FML

#20186305
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23201) - you deserved it (1886)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:00am - misc - by hinowdie - United States

Today, a co-worker asked me if I have a Facebook account, and I said I do. I had to politely smile as he spent the next half hour insulting me for supposedly being glued to it 24/7, before claiming that it's all a CIA front to steal people's social security details. Why are nutjobs like this even alive? FML

#20175635
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19688) - you deserved it (3075)

On 11/23/2012 at 7:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a sex dream, which I interrupted by having an OCD-induced panic attack because apparently we weren't using protection. My brain won't even let me enjoy the fantasy action I get in my sleep. FML

#20171880
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33036) - you deserved it (3587)

On 11/21/2012 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Dead_Fox (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

#20176033
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29486) - you deserved it (2118)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Read The Fine Print - United States (California)

Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML

#20177662
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20910) - you deserved it (7751)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML

#20185812
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8386) - you deserved it (32835)

On 11/30/2012 at 8:28pm - misc - by goodbye cruel world (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

#20179829
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27753) - you deserved it (3161)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:13pm - misc - by Autocorrected - Philippines (Manila)



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