Sunday 18 November 2012 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I had a sex dream, which I interrupted by having an OCD-induced panic attack because apparently we weren't using protection. My brain won't even let me enjoy the fantasy action I get in my sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19481) - you deserved it (1874)
On 11/21/2012 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Dead_Fox (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, a co-worker asked me if I have a Facebook account, and I said I do. I had to politely smile as he spent the next half hour insulting me for supposedly being glued to it 24/7, before claiming that it's all a CIA front to steal people's social security details. Why are nutjobs like this even alive? FML
I agree, your life sucks (12002) - you deserved it (1809)
On 11/23/2012 at 7:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend looked me straight in the eye and said, "I know about the sea turtles." I asked her what she was talking about and she said, "Next time, shut up or I'll show you pain." I have no idea what she's talking about. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14526) - you deserved it (1243)
On 11/19/2012 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13089) - you deserved it (5268)
On 11/25/2012 at 1:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat, he also got inside the car and sat next to my date, pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back to the house. My mom laughed and gave him $20. It was a dare. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20651) - you deserved it (1489)
On 11/12/2012 at 10:47pm - misc - by Mmkay1515 (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I have a tooth infection that's spread to my jaw and ear. It hurts so badly that I'm practically in tears. Today's also the day I found out I'm allergic to the medication I was prescribed. Everything hurts, I'm covered in hives, and I can't stop throwing up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25415) - you deserved it (1433)
On 11/16/2012 at 7:30pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Croatia (Primorsko-Goranska)
Today, my boss asked me if I had any special plans for Christmas. After I told him I was planning a trip to Canada, he snapped, "Well, you can forget it. I need you at the office." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15736) - you deserved it (876)
On 11/22/2012 at 12:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my cat went into labor. This is surprising since 6 years ago, we paid to have her spayed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17484) - you deserved it (1091)
On 11/22/2012 at 8:34pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)
Today, I learned that last week, the UPS man gave my package to my neighbor for safekeeping. It was over five-hundred dollars' worth of merchandise. My neighbor left for Canada on Saturday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15211) - you deserved it (912)
On 11/12/2012 at 1:40pm - money - by siciliano12594 - United States (New York)
Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19025) - you deserved it (1269)
On 11/21/2012 at 4:54am - misc - by WamBamSam - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)
Today, my long distance boyfriend broke up with me. Tomorrow he should be expecting the super long love letter that I poured my heart into and sent him a week ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18825) - you deserved it (1344)
On 11/24/2012 at 2:02am - love - by whatever (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was working at the checkout of a nearly empty store, so I picked up an empty box, closed my eyes, and slow-danced with it to the 80s love ballad playing on the radio. I don't know what's worse, dancing with a box, or opening my eyes to see ten or so wary customers waiting to be served. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5365) - you deserved it (24279)
On 11/13/2012 at 5:23am - work - by foreveralone (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I fell off my boyfriend's motorcycle. I had a few scrapes and bruises, and my boyfriend called for an ambulance as a precaution. The paramedics managed to drop me on my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19650) - you deserved it (1164)
On 11/24/2012 at 9:35pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Friday 24 May 2013
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