Saturday 17 November 2012 
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Today, I was at the library using a computer to order a package. A man sat down next to me mumbling to himself while staring at me. As I got up to go to the printer, he pointed at me and screamed, "I will burn you alive and enjoy it!" All of my info including my address was still on the computer screen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16854) - you deserved it (3273)
On 11/13/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by sarahcurtis213 - United States
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house having dinner with her and her parents. I was casually playing footsie with my girlfriend under the table, until her mom stopped eating and said, "You know that's my foot, right?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (7690) - you deserved it (18912)
On 11/20/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Brian (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend while we were on my couch having a romantic moment. She seemed incredibly excited when she saw the ring and put it on. The way she bolted out the door tells me I'm not going to see her again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19211) - you deserved it (1271)
On 11/15/2012 at 1:35am - love - by minime94 (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I took a picture of myself wearing a whipped cream bra with cherry nipples, captioned, "I hope you enjoyed your dinner, now how about some dessert???" I meant to send it to my fiancé. I sent it by mistake to my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11607) - you deserved it (28637)
On 11/24/2012 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Whipped Cream - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my room-mates were inspired by a TV show to make a "douchebag jar", into which we have to put money every time we say something obnoxious. It seems like I can't open my mouth without having to cough up £10. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4937) - you deserved it (14881)
On 11/24/2012 at 1:41pm - misc - by kay51 (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my girlfriend admitted to me that she has been sleeping with someone on her girls basketball team, which at first turned me on. Then I found out he's the team manager. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18584) - you deserved it (5838)
On 11/15/2012 at 8:37am - love - by SweetStuff88 (man) - United States
Today, my girlfriend claimed she was a Viking because she's pale and has blond hair. She also warned me that if I piss her off she'll go 'berserk' on me. She demonstrated by smacking me in the nuts with a wooden spoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16204) - you deserved it (2169)
On 11/18/2012 at 2:45am - love - by jasmith - United States (Texas)
Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21409) - you deserved it (3604)
On 11/19/2012 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17086) - you deserved it (1744)
On 11/24/2012 at 11:35am - misc - by lobstercola - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I share a birthday with a fictional character who is "untrustworthy" and has a "dark side", so therefore I can't be trusted either. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17571) - you deserved it (1341)
On 11/15/2012 at 12:48am - love - by B-Rad (man) - United States
Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20335) - you deserved it (3719)
On 11/16/2012 at 8:06pm - work - by wow @ creepy fuckers (man) - United States
Today, I was messing around with my wife. I grabbed her boobs and said, "Honk honk". Unbeknownst to me, my daughter saw it. Now my 3-year-old girl runs around honking everyone. Even her grandparents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8779) - you deserved it (22132)
On 11/21/2012 at 8:20pm - kids - by piemasterzim (man) - Canada
Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19086) - you deserved it (1749)
On 11/13/2012 at 7:02am - love - by Med (man) - Netherlands (Groningen)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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