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Friday 16 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I arrived home after a hard day's work to see my 12-year-old sister had greased up my 8-year-old brother with butter and olive oil, and was attempting to slide him down the wooden floorboards in the hallway. FML

#20161557
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23150) - you deserved it (2261)

On 11/13/2012 at 5:00am - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML

#20172058
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28267) - you deserved it (2213)

On 11/21/2012 at 4:54am - misc - by WamBamSam - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I was nicknamed "Sandman." Not after the bad-ass Spider Man villain but rather because my personality is so boring it puts people to sleep. FML

#20173388
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19878) - you deserved it (4091)

On 11/22/2012 at 2:25am - misc - by zzz - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boss asked me if I had any special plans for Christmas. After I told him I was planning a trip to Canada, he snapped, "Well, you can forget it. I need you at the office." FML

#20173791
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25246) - you deserved it (1720)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I called Costco to ask them not to renew my membership because of financial problems. The man on the phone spent 30 minutes telling me why I'm a fool to leave and I ended up with a renewed $55 membership and 25 minutes over my minute allowance. FML

Today, I'm in the hospital and it's been 44 hours since I've eaten anything. My doctors won't let me eat and my parents are sitting across the room, eating. FML

#20171321
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25221) - you deserved it (1672)

On 11/20/2012 at 6:25pm - health - by RayneSong - United States (Michigan)

Today, while working at the coffee shop, I had to empty the garbage cans. One of the bags gave way, and all the half-finished cups of coffee spilled all over my uniform. Most customers' orders cost more than I make per hour. FML

#20166731
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21460) - you deserved it (2163)

On 11/17/2012 at 1:35pm - work - by overpriced coffee shop worker - United States (California)

Today, while giving a lecture on gender equality in the workplace, a woman yelled from the back, asking me why I'm not out starting a war somewhere. I stopped talking and tried to pinpoint her in the crowd, which she took as a sign to snort and call me a pussy. Nobody would back me up. FML

#20168119
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20520) - you deserved it (2522)

On 11/18/2012 at 1:40pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Latvia (Riga)

Today, I was so bored with my job at McDonald's that I actually hoped someone would come in and make a huge mess for me to clean. No one did. FML

#20173284
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21742) - you deserved it (3936)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:44am - work - by Ophelia - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my cat went into labor. This is surprising since 6 years ago, we paid to have her spayed. FML

#20174337
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26915) - you deserved it (1930)

On 11/22/2012 at 8:34pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my mom has officially lost 100 pounds due to a lap-band surgery. After sharing her excitement, she also shared her troubles. She said, "Everything hangs now, even my cooter. Can they fix that?" Thank you for the mental image, mom. FML

#20159898
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21788) - you deserved it (1776)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:25am - health - by KtSue - United States

Today, I bought a new armband to hold my iPhone while working out so I can listen to music and I was excited to start getting in shape. Unfortunately, when I tried it on, my arm was too big and it didn't fit. FML

#20168720
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21463) - you deserved it (6684)

On 11/18/2012 at 10:13pm - health - by joe - United States (Maryland)

Today, while working as a massage therapist, a client had me work on a very specific knot in his shoulder. He also happened to have a very detailed, very realistic tattoo of the crucifixion on his shoulder. I just spent 45 minutes violating Jesus. FML

#20173351
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23668) - you deserved it (3977)

On 11/22/2012 at 1:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States



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