Friday 9 November 2012 
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Today, I found a wounded turkey in our backyard. I brought it inside, put it in a cage, and tended to its wounds. I then left. When I got back home, I smelled the wonderful aroma of my mother's cooking. She had prepared a turkey, the one I'd rescued. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17622) - you deserved it (3357)
On 11/13/2012 at 6:17pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)
Today, at daycare, a little girl cussed me out because I didn't have any apple juice left. When I called her parents, they sided with her and cussed me out too. My boss refused to sympathize, and reprimanded me for not making sure we still had apple juice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16923) - you deserved it (1564)
On 11/05/2012 at 12:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was playing with my cat. I tried to put him on my stomach, but he refused to stay put. Ever since I lost weight, he won't lay with me or purr. I think my fat was the only thing he liked about me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15830) - you deserved it (1633)
On 11/06/2012 at 3:27pm - animals - by creedonfied - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31434) - you deserved it (1153)
On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my friend joked to my co-workers that my kitty-cat of a husband was going to beat me for spending $200 on shoes. Later on, my rather large dog was so excited to see me when I walked in the door, he split my lip. Somehow, I don't think they'll believe me when I get to the office tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14790) - you deserved it (1807)
On 11/06/2012 at 4:32am - work - by iLuvsIt (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my dad put an onion in my room, telling me spirits won't haunt me and that I won't get sick. He thinks a vegetable will protect me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12159) - you deserved it (1477)
On 11/14/2012 at 7:48pm - health - by duhasiangirl - Canada (Ontario)
Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23630) - you deserved it (2154)
On 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by thanks, fuckface (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21062) - you deserved it (1541)
On 11/15/2012 at 9:45pm - love - by Sexting Parents - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I came home to find that my girlfriend had repainted my bedroom. As she had offered to do it, it shouldn't have been a problem. However, she decided to return the several unopened cans of off-white paint that I'd bought for something "more neutral." Like "Sunset Orange." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13415) - you deserved it (1778)
On 11/16/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by spaceforrent - United States
Today, I was bitched out by my supervisor because of my lack of "customer service" skills. I work at a jail and all my "customers" are criminals. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16490) - you deserved it (2946)
On 11/07/2012 at 12:48am - work - by jailofc (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, while at work, a customer gave me a $20 tip. I explained to him we aren't allowed to accept tips, but he insisted. When I called the manager to report it, he pocketed my tip. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9691) - you deserved it (18024)
On 11/10/2012 at 2:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after a year of living with my boyfriend at our new place, he told me that he wants to sell our house and live in a trailer, so he can be closer to his mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14640) - you deserved it (1420)
On 11/08/2012 at 4:22pm - misc - by Anonimo (woman) - Italy (Sardegna)
Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18437) - you deserved it (1726)
On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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