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Monday 5 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I walked in on my son teabagging his sister over a video game. FML

#20156633
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23841) - you deserved it (3044)

On 11/09/2012 at 7:30pm - kids - by john r.t. (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, due to a health insurance mix up, my schizophrenic girlfriend has been off her meds for a little over a week. She's convinced I can read her mind, and if I don't stop "pretending" she'll slit my throat in my sleep. Her medication won't be available for at least another two weeks. FML

#20159457
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24012) - you deserved it (2262)

On 11/11/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it was my birthday. I finally got the PS3 I've been asking for, for a long time. When I opened the box, I didn't find a PS3, but a bunch of clothes that my mom put in my brother's PS3 box. FML

#20157168
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25636) - you deserved it (3879)

On 11/10/2012 at 4:02am - misc - by Shauna (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was told I will be having twins; this came as a shock since there are no twins in my family. When I asked my mom about it, she said that she wasn't surprised and not to worry about it because she had "absorbed her twin" and that the problem would "take care of itself." FML

#20154574
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23168) - you deserved it (1848)

On 11/08/2012 at 1:13am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was giving my son a driving lesson. He blatantly ran a red light, so I told him to pull over to let me drive us home. As I walked over to the driver-side door, he instead locked me out and drove off by himself. FML

#20156278
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29018) - you deserved it (6894)

On 11/09/2012 at 1:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Argentina (Buenos Aires)

Today, my teacher wore a bikini at the pool. She is 68. FML

#20153506
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22062) - you deserved it (3930)

On 11/07/2012 at 1:39pm - work - by Owen - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to present a program to my supervisors in University. Not being a native English speaker, I used my own invented abbreviations for parameters in the program. Apparently STD is not an appropriate abbreviation for "standard deviation." I can still hear them laughing. FML

#20156190
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22337) - you deserved it (7602)

On 11/09/2012 at 11:23am - work - by EnglishLearner (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML

#20160279
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34557) - you deserved it (6216)

On 11/12/2012 at 10:10am - health - by poserpilot - United States (California)

Today, my friends and I went out to dinner. Being short on cash, I suggested a game where we put our phones in the center of the table and first to check their phone had to pay the bill. Our conversation died out, and fearful of having an awkward silence, I checked my phone. FML

#20160706
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6677) - you deserved it (51678)

On 11/12/2012 at 5:08pm - money - by dgilbs - United States (Michigan)

Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML

#20157197
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32174) - you deserved it (2826)

On 11/10/2012 at 5:15am - love - by Helen - United States (Arkansas)

Today, while sitting in a waiting room, a man assured me "The safety's on" after he handed his kid his BB gun. A minute later, I practically had a hole in my foot. FML

#20160435
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20531) - you deserved it (2522)

On 11/12/2012 at 1:12pm - health - by Emily - United States (California)

Today, after finally falling asleep, my boyfriend woke me up and got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, and I'm lying in bed wide awake. FML

#20158574
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23948) - you deserved it (2828)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I finally met the girl I've been talking to on phone for a while and found her charming in person as well. There's just one problem: she has more facial hair than I do. FML

#20159578
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21173) - you deserved it (6192)

On 11/11/2012 at 9:16pm - love - by x (man) - United States (New York)



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